


Rosy

by yetnotyet



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: CEO, Eventual Smut, F/F, Smut, lipves - Freeform, sugar mommy yves
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-07
Updated: 2019-09-24
Packaged: 2020-08-11 16:21:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 20,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20156512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yetnotyet/pseuds/yetnotyet
Summary: It doesn't take too long for pale cheeks to become rosy.





	1. stylish

Jungeun took a deep breath before entering the password; the small machine on the counter making beeping noises which just raked her nerves up higher. She wasn't sure if her card was going to come through and it made the back of her neck grow cold.

And Jungeun wasn't exaggerating, at least, in her perspective. She needed these clothes for work, or else, they were probably going to fire her. The company's card had been lost a few hours ago. Luck was not on her side.

"I'm sorry Ms., but your card has been declined."

The words rang in her ears painfully, and deep down, she could feel tears welling up - although she wasn't planning on letting them come down her face. Jungeun sighed, closing her eyes for a moment, deliberating what to do….

Not many options were available.

"Here, swipe mine." A voice came from behind her just as soon as she forced her eyes open.

It was a woman; just a bit taller than her, dark brown hair leaning on the redder side, high cheekbones and dressed like eight figures. Before Jungeun could say anything, the transaction had already been completed.

The woman's arm brushed against her shoulder as she grabbed the receipt from the cashier. She walked away without a second thought, seemingly unbothered by the brief, if not meaningless, interaction. Jungeun ran after her, not without grabbing the paper bag containing the clothes - she meant to give them back as soon as she catched up to her.

"Hey, wait!" Jungeun shouted, breathless. She was already exhausted from all the running around looking for the company card, and the nameless woman wasn't helping at all.

Said woman turned around with what Jungeun could only describe as effortless grace, a small smile on her lips. "Yes?"

"Ah- I'm sorry, l-lady, I- I can't take this from you." She extended the arm with the bag toward the woman, nervous and shuffling, but trying not to show it. It was hard to behave like a normal person, particularly in front of someone who seemed nothing like commonfolk. Someone who seemed like royalty.

The woman laughed; a small, cheerful but still graceful laugh, and approached Jungeun with elegant steps.

"What is your name?" The woman asked, keeping her gaze at Jungeun unwavering.

"It's… it's Jungeun." She breathed out, returning her arm to a natural position after realising the woman wouldn't take the bag. In all honesty, she began to feel like an idiot while facing her.

"I'm Sooyoung. And you will take it, okay?"

"That's… that's too much…" the words trembled coming out of her lips, "Sooyoung."

Sooyoung smiled after hearing her name. "It's not. Besides, I didn't do it out of charity, but because I wanted to."

Jungeun couldn't understand. Her eyes travelled side to side, wandering, while her own mind wandered as well. Out of nowhere, this? It wasn't possible her luck had come back. It never did.

"You have good taste. I noticed." Sooyoung remarked, observing Jungeun with curious eyes. "If you really wish to repay me, come give me a visit. Here."

Sooyoung handed her a platinum card, with letters engraved in burgundy red. It felt cold to the touch, and Jungeun stared at it for a long time, memorizing the numbers and letters slowly.

“I’ll see you soon.” Sooyoung gave her a small wave, and left the store, leaving Jungeun alone and confused.

The woman had definitely made an impression.

_Akin to a lipstick stain on skin._

[...]

She moved the card between her fingers, brows furrowed, lost in thought. By now, she didn’t need it anymore; everything was already in her mind, swimming around like new information that doesn’t know just where to settle down yet.

Jungeun had escaped being fired this time, although dismissing it as luck. For her, it was just a coincidence that Sooyoung had swept in just in time. But she wasn’t sure how long the company would still keep her; she feared not long.

Besides, it was always good to have more options at your side, particularly when you are dangling from the edge, sure you’re going to fall soon. And of course that was the reason - not because the woman’s perfect complexion and elegance was imprinted in Jungeun’s mind.

Not at all.

She grabbed her bag, took a deep breath, and left for the bus stop, rehashing possibilities and more possibilities in her mind.

It didn’t take long for her to find the address. After all, it was the tallest and most eye-catching building in the province. Jungeun headed for the door with nervous steps, still quite unsure, but not planning to stop for a second.

Someone buzzed her in with disinterest after she flashed the platinum card, and Jungeun couldn’t help but feel all kinds of amazed while walking into the building. Everything looked clean and brushed and expensive.

Jungeun walked toward the marble counters, feeling afraid to even touch them with her fingers. The girl behind the counter looked at her for a minute, scanning her briefly and then summoning the person who had buzzed her in.

“Hyunjin, why’d you let her in?”

The girl leaned toward her, a puzzling expression in her face.

“She has a card.” Hyunjin said simply, not a bit threatened by the girl.

Jungeun looked on, confused, wondering if she should just walk away before any of this got more complicated.

“Which one?”

“The platinum one.”

The girl’s eyes widened like full moons and Jungeun finally had the opportunity to look at her name tag.

_Hyejoo._

Hyejoo looked at her with seriousness. “Ms., where did you get that card?”

“A… a woman gave it to me.”

“Go back, Hyunjin, I’ll deal with her.” She waved her out, and returned her gaze to Jungeun. “Can I see the card?”

“... sure.” She fished it out of her jean pocket, handing it over.

Hyejoo looked it over with care, analyzing the edges and tapping the metal with her nails. Finally, she handed the card back over to Jungeun with certain hesitation.

“Who are you here for, Ms.?”

“A woman named Sooyoung.”

The girl got startled, getting up from her chair briefly.

“You mean, Ha Sooyoung?”

Jungeun scratched the back of her neck, ashamed of ever coming in. “... uh, I think so.”

“You gotta be kidding me. There’s no way the CEO wants to see you. I’m sure. I’ll call her just in case…” Hyejoo fiddled with her phone’s cable while dialing, looking down as if she had lost something.

“Uh, hey, Sooyoung? There’s a girl here saying you handed her a card… yeah, yeah, the platinum one. Yeah, she’s blonde. Wait… what? Are you sure? Fine. Fine, I’ll send her in.”

Jungeun avoided looking at Hyejoo just so she felt a little bit less embarrassed; it didn’t work too well.

“You can proceed to the elevator on your right, I guess. Just use your card, it’s the last floor.”

She nodded, her nerves peaking with the thought of seeing Sooyoung again. Was she going to be dressed like eight figures a second time? Judging by the building and everything else she had seen, probably.

Jungeun entered the elevator, looking for the button indicating the last floor - she didn’t even know how many floors there were. But there was no such thing, and she considered giving up and handing the card back, disappearing like she was never there.

She lifted the platinum to her eyes, frustrated, and a beep startled her; she had to stabilize herself by grabbing the steel bar as the elevator started moving. Minutes that felt like hours passed, and a ding announced she had arrived at what looked like the last floor. Another marble counter greeted her view and she proceeded slowly toward it.

The girl behind the counted greeted her with a gleeful smile. Her name tag said Chaewon.

"You're Ms. Jungeun, right?" Chaewon asked, typing away at the keyboard as she spoke.

"Yeah."

"She'll see you in a minute."

Jungeun waited, sipping a cup of water offered by Chaewon. It was getting late when Sooyoung finally appeared, opening the door which lead to her office.

"Hey, you came." The woman had a poised smile, wearing a burgundy dress shirt and high-waisted formal pants. She looked even taller in heels, but if Jungeun was being honest, she wasn't really focusing on her feet.

She got up from her seat, smiling nervously and approaching with certain caution. They entered the room without ceremony, the blonde looking over everything with a gleam in her eyes. Jungeun couldn't lie, Sooyoung's life was one she had dreamed about as a kid.

"You like what you see?" The woman asked her, letting out charming laughter which rang melodically in Jungeun's ears.

"Can't lie, I sure do." Jungeun brushed her hair behind her ear, suddenly embarrassed. There was a clear contrast between the two of them, and although the blonde was turning infatuated with Sooyoung, she couldn't help but feel a little left out.

"I know what you're thinking. That you and me are too different." Sooyoung leaned on the centerpiece, a dark work table, looking down, seemingly lost in thought. "You could be in a position just as high as mine, Jungeun. But you know why you're not?"

Jungeun furrowed her eyebrows. She didn't expect for this to turn into a lecture.

"Because of the glass ceiling. I'm sure you're just as capable, if not more. It's why I only hire women."

"I don't… see the point."

"The point is, I can't change things immediately. But I can help, even when I don't need to."

Jungeun laughed. "Out of the kindness of your heart?"

"At this point in time, I think you know the answer."

The blonde crossed her arms. She had imagined as much; Sooyoung wanted something in return. _But what exactly?_

"Just tell me what is it you want from me then."

Sooyoung smiled. She approached Jungeun a little more, slowly, until they were a foot away from each other. "I can provide for you, Jungeun. Give you whatever you want and a little more. God knows I have more money than I'll ever spend in a lifetime."

She kept staring at her, still with the same poise and elegance Jungeun remembered. But it was more raw, more aggressive.

"All I want in return, is your… affections."

The setting sun was casting beautiful shadows in Sooyoung's face, the multitude of colors like an art piece. Jungeun understood what she meant; she wasn't dense. And the worst part was? Jungeun was inclined to say yes.

"You don't need to answer me now. It is only a proposition. However, I did you a favor back then, and I expect the favor to be returned."

Jungeun assumed Sooyoung would do something; get her favor back. But the woman was motionless, seemingly awaiting. The blonde did the only thing she could think of doing, and kissed her on the cheek, feeling soft skin on her lips. She felt it deep, - rooting itself in her being - the infatuation, growing into something more. Something she couldn't explain just yet.

But Jungeun knew it was there.

She stepped away from Sooyoung, her cheeks and ears aflame.

"I… hope that was enough for you." Jungeun turned her back to the woman. But before heading out, she looked at Sooyoung one final time. "See you soon."

That was her way.

_Her way of staining her own mark._


	2. D-1

The atmosphere was already dark as she entered the open french doors. Her stomach was unsettled, spinning round and round like the thoughts in her head. Her boss's hands were clasped together, fingers moving up and down in sync. It made Jungeun even more nervous.

"Someone told me you lost the company card." His words echoed like pin pricks all over her skin. Nothing good was coming out of this and she was sure.

"Yeah… it's true."

"The. Company. Card." He listed the words as if doing so would make the card appear like magic. “Do you have any idea how awful this is? Have you no responsibility, Jungeun?”

“I’m sorry, sir.”

“You know that sorry is not gonna cut it.”

She looked at him, knowing what was coming. After all, he had done this to other employees too.

“I want your resignation letter by Monday. No delays.”

Jungeun took a deep breath, and nodded.

“Yes, sir.”

The blonde resigned on Saturday. It was how the business worked in his mind; he would threaten and throttle their opportunities if someone didn’t resign, just so he could reap the benefits to himself or other higher-ups.

Sooyoung’s words came to mind.

_Because of the glass ceiling._

She stormed off the company, cursing her boss and everyone else who made her feel small before, and headed for the building of promise.

This deal was off, but she had another one waiting for her.

[...]

This time no one questioned her or paid her any mind. She assumed it was because of certain measures in place; Sooyoung had definitely informed everyone about Jungeun this time.

She took some time to breathe and calm herself down as the elevator moved up, enjoying the cool atmosphere of the building. The steel doors slided open and she greeted Chaewon with a smile - the girl had shown her nothing but kindness before, and she certainly would pass it back.

“It’s nice to see you again, Ms. Jungeun.”

“Don’t worry, you can just call me Jungeun.”

Chaewon smiled, nodding. “Of course. She will be here in a minute.”

Jungeun furrowed her eyebrows. “Oh, she isn’t in her office?”

“She went out twenty minutes ago. Should be back soon.”

The blonde sat on the comfortable couch and waited. But knowing she would never have an opportunity like this again, at least, not that she knew of, Jungeun got up again, walking around the room while raking her brain for questions.

“How long have you worked here, Chaewon?”

“Since I was about sixteen. Why do you ask?”

“Oh, I was just curious. Do you know everyone here?”

“As work colleagues, yeah. But on a personal level, only Hyejoo and Hyunjin. They’re closer to my age.”

Jungeun remembered those two. They fit together if she thought about it; all young and with closer experiences. Not that she was far away in age either.

“And about Sooyoung?”

“What about her?”

Jungeun smiled, still shuffling her feet as she spoke. “How long has she been the CEO?”

“The role was passed to her when she was fourteen.”

The blonde’s eyes widened as she did the math; the woman was twenty two, and Jungeun knew this because she googled her.

_Sooyoung was the CEO for eight ears? Holy shit._

Just as she sat back down to process things in her mind, the elevator made a ding and out came Sooyoung. This time she was wearing a pink tank top and low waisted jeans paired with a black belt.

“Chaewon, can you have Jinsol bring the Corvette? As soon as I head out.”

“Sure thing.”

Sooyoung only noticed her after a minute, and she smirked widely when she did. “Oh, Jungeun. You’re here.”

Jungeun smiled back, partly because seeing the woman again brought back memories, partly because she was just breathtaking, even in what you could name simple clothes.

“Come, let’s talk in my office.”

She followed her in, nerves peaking as she heard the door click shut.

“So, you came here to give me an answer?” Sooyoung had her hands on her hips, curious eyes fixed on Jungeun.

The blonde took a deep breath like many times before. If she were to be honest with herself, Jungeun knew from the first time Sooyoung made the proposition, her answer was yes.

Her answer had always been yes.

“Yeah, I’ve made my mind.” She returned the stare, looking at the woman’s eyes with determination. “I’ll accept it.”

Sooyoung looked at her for a moment, as if she was trying to sense some sort of deception, but Jungeun was as honest as one could be.

“Great. Well, then let’s head out, I’m dying for some lunch.”

Jungeun followed her outside, and the lights killed themselves without the need of a switch. Sooyoung locked the office.

“Hey, Chaewon, we’re leaving. Feel free to take a break.”

“Alright, thanks Sooyoung.”

They entered the elevator, standing in silence as it went down. It felt awkward, particularly after the deal which had just been sealed.

“So, where are we going?”

“I don’t know,” the woman brushed her hair back with nonchalance. Was it possible that she just didn’t know how attractive she was? “maybe some sushi. You like sushi?” She smiled, noticing the way Jungeun was looking at her.

“S-sure… yeah.”

The elevator stopped. They were underground, in the garage, and Jungeun saw a bunch of cars lined up, all of them quite expensive-looking.

Another car was quickly approaching, blinding Jungeun for a moment with its headlights. It was the previously mentioned Corvette, red and shiny. Behind the wheel was a blonde woman. She parked near the curb and got out of the car.

“You weren’t joyriding my car, were you Jinsol?” Sooyoung asked, grabbing the keys from her hand.

“No,” Jinsol answered, but she had a smirk on her lips and it was quite suspicious. “I would never.”

“Sure…” Sooyoung trailed, eyeing the woman with suspicion. “Let’s go, Jungeun.”

They entered the car, inching slowly toward the exit. Jinsol was waving them goodbye frantically and it made Jungeun laugh out loud.

“Yeah, she’s funny like that.”

Jungeun felt around for a minute. It was her first time on a sport car. It was clean and tidy, a light floral scent in every corner.

"You still feel weird?" Sooyoung asked, still focusing on the road, but stealing a glance at Jungeun from time to time.

Jungeun snorted laughter, staring at Sooyoung while she drove. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"After accepting my offer."

"Hey," the blonde reached for Sooyoung's wrist, wrapping her fingers around it. She wasn't sure why she did it, but Jungeun imagined it was going to happen eventually anyway. "I'll try my best to not make this awkward, and I'm sure you'll do the same."

"Yeah. Makes sense."

They passed the rest of the time in the car in silence, occasionally stealing glances at each other. Sooyoung parked swiftly on the nearest free spot, locking the car with a high beep beep. They stood for a second on the sidewalk. Jungeun still didn't know exactly where they were going.

"Hey, give me your hand." Sooyoung extended her hand to her.

"Why?" The blonde asked, although she was already reaching for it herself. Their fingers met and intertwined quickly like they knew how to; like they had done it before.

"I'm making this less awkward."

Sooyoung's hand was soft, fingers slender and nails manicured to perfection, painted nude. Jungeun wouldn't confess this, at least, not now, but her heart quickened its beats. She hoped her own hand wouldn't start sweating.

They entered the restaurant, and Jungeun instantly knew it wasn't regular sushi they were about to eat. They sat at a table closer to the back of the restaurant, and Jungeun looked at the menu with wide eyes. The prices weren't even listed, and that was why she knew it was because no one came here if they could not afford it. She noticed all the businessmen in suits, sometimes staring at her like she didn't belong.

"Pay them no mind." Sooyoung looked at her with a serious stare, her lips in a straight line. "And pick whatever you want. No restrictions."

She did. Soon, their table was filled with deliciousness; salmon and a variety of other kinds of sushi occupying any free space there once was. Jungeun dug in with impatience, only now realising how hungry she truly was.

"Oh my god, this is delicious..."

Sooyoung ate too, although a bit more conservatively, and laughed at Jungeun's table manners.

"So, how was your day?" The woman asked, taking a sip of her drink.

"Well, I got fired, for starters."

Jungeun said it like it didn't affect her, but getting fired had been her worst fear for a while, and it came true.

"No… Jungeun, I'm so sorry."

"It's okay. I saw it coming. Besides, I wasn’t fit for the job in the end.”

Sooyoung shook her head. “I’m sure that’s not true.”

“Maybe, I guess. The glass ceiling and all, you know?”

The woman nodded, raising her drink to the air. “Cheers to that.”

Jungeun clinked their glasses together, smiling and laughing and all around having a good time. She hadn't had one of those in a while.

[...]

They walked around Apgujeong-dong, holding hands like girlfriends would. Sooyoung pointed out all the good stores, and Jungeun finally saw one that peaked her interest.

"You might as well go to Urban Outfitters," the woman muttered as they went in. Her disdain for a hip hop clothing store was justifiable given her usual style, but Jungeun was determined to change that.

"Will you quiet down? I have an idea." The blonde dragged Sooyoung inside. Jungeun browsed excitedly while the woman only looked on, still disinterested. _Of course, she's the poshest of posh…_

Jungeun spotted a green bomber jacket, and immediately thought it would look great on Sooyoung. She removed it from the hanger, showing it to the woman with a huge smile.

"Put this on." The blonde stated, already pushing the zipper down. "Come on, I won't ask twice."

After a minute, Sooyoung finally gave up, sliding her arms inside the jacket. She looked at the mirror with an unreadable expression, seemingly analyzing how she looked.

To Jungeun, she looked hot.

The blonde hit her on the shoulder. "Stop staring so hard, you know you look great in anything." She stated matter-of-factly.

Sooyoung spotted a perfect opportunity to tease her. "Oh, is that right? Tell me more."

Jungeun rolled her eyes, adjusting a red beanie on herself and looking at the mirror. "See, this is fashion too."

"I never denied that."

They kept the light debate even after Sooyoung paid for the items; she had decided to keep the jacket. Jungeun had great taste after all, and it felt good to wear something the girl had chosen.

Sooyoung continued to swipe her card throughout the day - it really meant nothing to her, particularly after hearing Jungeun had been fired. She hoped it wasn't bothering the girl.

"Hey, it's a photo booth! I love these." Jungeun pointed out, pulling the woman toward it. They climbed inside and shut the door. "You probably don't carry won, but I do!" She remarked, pulling a small bill from her pocket and inserting it into the machine.

"You're so happy." Sooyoung kept her gaze on her, not minding the machine indicating how much time they had until it started taking pictures. "Aren't you afraid of me?"

Jungeun looked at her with a smile, but her eyes were questioning. "Afraid? Why would I be afraid?"

"I'm still a stranger to you."

_Flash._

"No. You're not. Besides, I'm not that interested in orthodox relationships. You're a good thing, Sooyoung. We're… we're a good thing."

She stared at her, but it was different this time. The world around them disappeared, and it was like the box shutting them from the outside wasn't momentaneous, but a forever thing. Jungeun wanted it to be a forever thing. She had always been attracted to Sooyoung, but being so close to her got her heart racing again.

_Flash._

They both reached at the same time, but it was clearly not a competition in the first place. Jungeun wrapped her arms around Sooyoung's neck as she kissed her, and her stomach sunk deeper than it ever did. The woman was holding her face, carefully as if she was holding a porcelain doll.

_Flash._

Jungeun held tight onto her, like Sooyoung was an anchor.

_Flash._

Sooyoung bit her lip, backed away a second, and kissed her again, brushing her nose against hers.

_Flash._

They separated; short of breath, looking at each other with gleaming eyes. Even as the photos got printed, they didn't stop staring.

"You… wanna say something?" Jungeun asked, not sure why, just knowing she wasn't going to be able to bare the silence any longer.

"No..." Sooyoung took a deep breath, red, parted lips still drawing Jungeun's attention. "how about we go?"

"Yeah, we should."

Sooyoung pulled her out, and they walked away from the photo booth, but not before Jungeun had stuffed the pictures in her back pocket.

_She was definitely keeping those._


	3. girl's talk

There were about two hundred unanswered messages or so waiting for her. Jungeun thought she had to go rogue for a while; if not, all that was happening was going to drive her crazy.

She picked up the phone and finally opened the messaging app, scrolling tiredly through the conversations.

**Jungeun**: I’m alive

**Jungeun**: and gay

**Heejin**: oh, good to know

**Heejin**: that you’re alive I mean

**Heejin**: the gay part we already knew

**Jiwoo**: IVE BEEN WORRIED SICK LITTLE LADY

**Jiwoo**: jk, but highkey I was worried :(

**Jiwoo**: srsly, when were you gonna tell us you got fired?

**Jungeun**: how d’ya know?

**Yeojin**: news travel fast

**Yeojin**: yerim told me

**Jungeun**: I’m going to kill a bitch

**Jungeun**: but also raise her and care for her

**Heejin**: passive aggressive is the way

**Yeojin**: hit me up if you need a job

**Jungeun**: but you don’t have a job

**Yerim**: I wouldn’t deny her influence if I were you

After catching up on things, Jungeun put the phone back in her pocket, but it buzzed quickly and she took it out again. It was a private message from Heejin.

**Heejin**: can we talk? in person, I mean?

**Jungeun**: sure.

The blonde headed for their usual meeting spot, a cafeteria next to Heejin’s house. She didn’t know what the girl wanted to talk about, but a bad feeling crept up her spine as she went through the glass swinging door.

Heejin was already there, sipping mango juice. She ordered another for Jungeun just as she sat opposite of her. She fished out her phone and showed a picture to the blonde.

Jungeun’s eyes widened. It was a picture of her and Sooyoung, holding hands and walking around Apgujeong-dong. She didn’t understand why would anyone take pictures of them, but then it clicked: Sooyoung was a CEO, of a really important company no less, and the paparazzi swarmed to famous people like moths to a flame.

“Care to explain why you are with the CEO of Y Class?” Heejin questioned, not in an accusing way, but it made Jungeun flinch nonetheless.

“I…”

She didn’t know how to explain it without sounding like bullshit. Their first meeting had been so sudden, and she didn’t know how to explain that either.

“I’m… she’s my…”

“Girlfriend?”

_That sounds better than sugar mommy. Doesn’t it?_

“Y-yeah.”

“Holy shit, Jungeun. How are you dating a CEO? Tell me your secrets.”

She didn’t understand how was Heejin smiling so wide like that. Well, of course the girl was a supportive friend, even after all these years. But she knew someone else who wouldn’t accept it as easily, even if the truth was masked with something else.

“Does Jiwoo know? About the picture?”

“I don’t know.” Heejin sipped her juice, thoughtful. “She probably does, but I can’t be sure of anything.”

Jungeun closed her eyes, thinking of the possible situations that would arise if Jiwoo knew. She was an overprotective friend, of that the blonde was sure.

“So, have you two slept together yet?”

“Heejin!”

“Just asking…” Heejin pouted, resting her arms on the table. “Is she a good kisser?”

Jungeun stared at her friend with her arms crossed, refusing to answer such a personal question.

_Yeah. She’s a pretty damn good kisser._

The pictures in her wallet were proof of it. But she would keep those only to herself.

"Anyway, you should talk to Jiwoo. You guys are tight-knitted, but who knows what could happen if you ever kept things hidden from each other."

Jungeun nodded, thoughtful. "Yeah, you're right."

A disaster would happen if they kept things hidden from each other.

[...]

Jungeun walked out of the cafe with her phone beeping with three new voice messages. Two of them were from her landlord, and the other, the blonde didn't recognize.

She tapped the screen, hearing the familiar ones first.

_"Ms. Kim, your rent is due next month. I hope you pay me forward, like you said you would."_

She shuddered as the message ended. Jungeun had completely forgotten about the rent money. _What am I going to do? I got fired- I have no money._

The next message started right after.

_"Ms. Kim! Just wanted to leave a message to thank you for making such a huge down payment to end your lease. Sorry that you have to move again, but I wish you luck in all your future endeavors!"_

Jungeun's eyes widened and she raised her eyebrows. She wasn't the one who had made a down payment, much less to end her lease. This was the only place that had hot water and a clean laundry room; Jungeun wouldn't let it go just like that.

And it clicked only when the next message started.

_"Hey, Jungeun, it's me. Sooyoung. I thought it would be weird if I just did this without warning you-"_

"Yeah, some warning would be nice..." she muttered, paying close attention to the recorded message.

_"so that's why I'm leaving this message. By the way, Chaewon was the one who gave me your number, just so you know. I'm expecting you back at the office so I can show you where your new home is. Anyway, this message is getting long-"_

And it ended there.

Jungeun sighed, frustrated. This? Just out of the blue? The blonde didn't know what to think. The lunch and gifts from the day before were nice, but a house? A new home?

_How am I supposed to repay that?_

Jungeun headed to the now familiar building, feeling a mixture of emotions escalate inside her. All she knew was that things weren't clear enough, and she was determined to change that.

Chaewon let her in right away, knowing Sooyoung was waiting for the girl. There was no time for small talk.

"You cancelled my lease." She remarked, watching the woman behind the table look up from her notebook.

Sooyoung smiled at her. Jungeun didn't think she understood how serious she was being. "Yes, I did."

"How is that okay? Couldn't you like- ask me first before removing me out of my own home?" She raised her voice higher, letting the anger flow through her body freely.

But still, she felt nerves accompany it.

The woman sighed, closing the notebook and looking down for a moment.

"I'm sorry, Jungeun. You're right. I shouldn't have." Sooyoung got up from her leather chair, approaching the girl with slow steps. "Do you want me to reverse it? Get your contract reinstated? I'll do what you want. What you need."

The blonde looked at her with a puzzled stare. This wasn't what she expected. She expected the woman to be demanding and authoritarian and-

"Tell me, Jungeun."

"I- I- no, I want to ask you a- a question." She didn't understand why she was stuttering. Even when the woman was soft and compliant, it left Jungeun a mess either way.

"Of course. What is it?" Sooyoung looked at her with a soft, inquisitive gaze.

"What are we doing? What are we- doing exactly? I just can't figure it out by myself." Jungeun felt like a weight was coming off her shoulders after blurting everything out.

Sooyoung laughed lightly. "I know what you mean. You don't understand the concept, or how it works. Remember the time I first made my proposition?" She inquired, bringing back memories to Jungeun's mind.

_I can provide for you, Jungeun._

_All I want in return is your… affections._

Her eyes opened and Sooyoung was holding her hand.

"The lavish life is yours to have, and I'll give it to you without hesitation." The woman caressed her cheek, causing chills to appear all over Jungeun's body. "But you have to give me something in return. And that something can't be bought."

Jungeun looked down, thinking.

"Does that mean..."

"Yeah. It means what you're thinking it means. A kiss on the cheek, hand-holding, and eventually sex too. I'll never force you to anything, or keep count either. But you know it will happen, or else you wouldn't have said yes."

She knew Sooyoung was right. From the beginning, Jungeun knew. She just was avoiding it, burying it deep in her mind so it wouldn't make her too nervous to function. But right now, Jungeun didn't avoid it. She accepted it, even welcomed it. And she admired Sooyoung's sincerity. The woman's ability to clear the air was a very amazing trait.

Jungeun smirked, not angry or tense anymore. She pushed Sooyoung, slowly, until the woman's hips were leaning on the table.

"If I were you, I would have gotten my number in a very different way." Jungeun teased, looking up at Sooyoung with sparkling eyes, slowly reaching behind her.

"And what way is that?" The woman played along, very clearly enjoying what was happening.

Jungeun reached inside Sooyoung's pocket, fishing her phone out. "Like this." She flaunted a naughty smile.

"Very interesting technique," Sooyoung grabbed her phone back, Jungeun still against her, "but we gotta go get your things." The woman lifted her in the air, spinning her around. Both felt very lightheaded from laughter as they left the office, drawing eyes.

They didn't care at all.

[...]

This time, Sooyoung got the blue Tesla out of the garage, and they headed to Jungeun's address. The blonde felt strange - slowly revealing parts of her life to the woman. It felt exciting and scary; but mostly scary, to do it just like that.

"So, where am I going to live now?" She asked casually, not really hoping to get an answer. Sooyoung had been secretive about it so far, even though this was literally about her living situation. Sooyoung could reassure her many times, but Jungeun still felt uneasy that everything would fall under her feet at any time.

"You don't need to worry," Sooyoung didn't need to be too careful about keeping her eye on the road this time, as the self-driving car led them without issue. "everything's being handled by trustworthy people."

The woman smiled at her sweetly, but there it was, still - that everlasting grace and calm. She took her hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

It was a long drive from the beautiful, rich province where the Y Class building was located, to the middle class apartment complex where Jungeun lived. She hadn't previously minded the distance because she had so much to think about and so many songs to listen to, but now, sitting in shotgun beside Sooyoung while the woman hummed _Girls Just Wanna Have Fun_ by _Cyndi Lauper_, her mind was a consuming mess, a grey area.

She was still thinking about Jiwoo.

Jungeun fished out her wallet from her purse, and pulled out the pictures from the photo booth. That day - that kiss - was still engraved in her mind, and the thought of them doing more of those drove the blonde crazy at times. Sooyoung had a smirk on her lips as she caught it with her eyes.

"You kept those?" She asked, not questioning it in a negative way, but with a soft, almost whisper-like tone.

"Yeah," Jungeun locked her gaze on hers, still holding the pictures with endearment. "of course I did."

Sooyoung did nothing but stare back at her for a while, eyes gleaming. Jungeun wondered, if it was a real relationship, would this be the moment where they would say I love you to each other? But Jungeun didn't have a lot of time to dwell on it, as a familiar view captured her attention back to the street.

There it was, her apartment complex, as real as everything else. Her two worlds were suddenly clashing.

Sooyoung parked in one of the many parking spots in front, and Jungeun got out of the car with nerve-wracking feelings, her stomach deciding it was an okay time to start freaking out.

“The movers will arrive shortly,” the Tesla doors closed with gradual speed, going down automatically. It was the first time Jungeun had ever seen a car do that. “why don’t we go over your things first?”

“Yeah,” Jungeun took a deep breath, thinking _this is happening, she’s seeing all my stuff_ and trying to keep her calm. “let’s do that.”

They headed upstairs, climbing steps as there were no elevators in the building. With a trembling hand, Jungeun typed in the code for her apartment, her nerves peaking when it beeped green, opening the door slowly.

Everything was still there. It reminded her of how she got the apartment in the first place; begging and bargaining until she finally had a good contract to put her signature on. The old desk where she drew and studied and brainstormed was there - filled with scratches and coffee ring stains - but still, there.

And the cranky old bed she couldn’t even jump on it or it would fall apart - still there.

Sooyoung looked at everything curiously, almost as if she was taking it in. Jungeun felt a little embarrassed that she was even there; she couldn’t help but feel small.

“Is this everything you have?”

“Some of it is still in my parents’ house. But most of it is here, yeah. I’m kinda proud of it, you know? My parents always said being on my own would be hard. And they were right.”

She approached the nightstand with reluctant steps, knowing what rested atop. It was a picture of her and Jiwoo, smiles wide for the camera, just fresh into high school. Jiwoo had been her first friend, and to Jungeun, it counted for a lot. She took out the picture from its frame, hiding it in her pocket. As quick as things were happening, she didn't want them to go this fast.

Jungeun wasn't ready for the clash.

[...]

Jungeun had not seen her message, but Jiwoo thought it was a good idea to surprise her anyway; after all, that was what best friends did.

She climbed the stairs quickly, muttering excuse me's to workers passing by with boxes. Soon, Jiwoo noticed they were coming from Jungeun's apartment. She furrowed her eyebrows, peeping into the apartment. Maybe she had just got it wrong.

Turns out, she didn't. A familiar color of hair came into view, catching her eye. And then, _a familiar face_. One Jiwoo had not expected to see, ever.

_What the hell are you doing here?_, Jiwoo asked mentally, as the woman spotted her back. There was only a blank stare directed at her in response.

She closed her eyes hard, opening them and expecting all of it to just disappear. Jiwoo's mind was trying to reason everything, but you can't reason a storm.

So she did the only thing that seemed reasonable; Jiwoo stormed out, the name still booming inside her head like loud, obnoxious music.

_Ha Sooyoung, Ha Sooyoung, Ha Sooyoung._

Because no matter how much Jungeun had wished her two worlds wouldn't clash… it would never work.

_All things considered, they had clashed long before._


	4. perfect love

"The code is 0609. Go on ahead, open it."

Jungeun was anxious as she keyed the numbers in, not expecting anything short of grandeur. They had previously passed rigid security and went up many levels, forty two precisely. The blonde had seen this type of care coming, but she couldn't help but feel like she didn't deserve it.

The first thing she noticed was the place's immensity. Her previous living quarters could be described as a matchbox if compared to it; a large, spacious living room filling her eyes. Jungeun basked in it, walking around slowly.

"So, what do you think? Better than the previous?"

Jungeun scoffed playfully. "Do I even need to say it?"

Sooyoung approached her, peering at the girl with gleaming eyes. "Yeah. I want to hear it from you. I always do."

Jungeun had a simple smile on her face, but inside, she was about to burst at the seams. Sooyoung's words had some form of magic in them, some magic which made her fall in deeper. It didn't help that the woman always looked gorgeous - this time, wearing a simple gray v-neck pullover and light blue ripped jeans. Jungeun liked to think she was the influence for this style.

The blonde pulled Sooyoung by the wrist, exploring the huge apartment further. The bedroom had a king-sized bed, complete with a pine canopy and light curtains. Jungeun immediately climbed up, jumping on the mattress like she was living her best life. She felt like it.

Next, the kitchen - counters in quartz and dark-stained oak cabinets. The sink, wide and stainless steel. Jungeun opened the fridge and almost yelled; it was fully stocked, even with double doors.

"Holy shit..." she muttered, reading the labels. Everything was cream-of-the-crop quality, as far as she could tell.

"A personal touch. I thought you would like it." Sooyoung remarked as if it was no biggie.

Jungeun closed the fridge, still in disbelief. "Are you kidding me? A stocked fridge? I would be happy with convenience store ramen."

The woman smiled, pleased. "There's some of that too."

She smiled wider when Jungeun placed her hand on her forehead, taking a minute to breathe in and out. "You're killing me here."

They went back to the living room. Like a kid, Jungeun couldn't resist jumping on the couch too, urging Sooyoung to do the same. The woman was hesitant at first, but the blonde was too persuasive, and soon, both of them were causing a ruckus. Jungeun half expected someone to show up and tell her to pipe the fuck down - that was what happened whenever she tried to sing or be energetic in her previous apartment. But there was only freedom and liberty here.

Jungeun had to remind herself of it every few seconds.

Out of energy, she finally stopped doing what she was actually supposed to do on the piece of furniture. Sooyoung sat beside her, catching her breath as well. Jungeun swung her feet, pondering over things. Her life had changed overnight, practically; she was probably the luckiest person alive, or one of them.

Without thinking about it much, she reached over to Sooyoung, and kissed her. She had been meaning to do it ever since the start of the _welcome to your new home parade_. It felt good to kiss her again.

They kissed slowly, parting and closing their lips against one another. Soon, Jungeun climbed on Sooyoung’s lap, the woman’s hand resting on the nape of her neck, caressing her blond locks.

Jungeun felt herself throb from the waist down, and had to stop herself. Sooyoung eyed her with curiosity as they both catched their breath, still inches from each other.

"What about you?" She diverted, still breathing heavily. "Where do you live?"

Sooyoung chuckled softly, still running fingers through Jungeun's hair.

"I have no home. I mean- I own plenty of houses, but..." the woman peered down thoughtfully. "no place I truly feel is home."

Jungeun rested her head on Sooyoung's shoulder. She wondered if the woman felt lonely, even with tons of influential people around her. And carrying the weight of a multi millionaire company must not feel great either, the blonde assumed.

“You have one now.” She muttered, appreciating the warmth that emanated from Sooyoung.

“Jungeun… this is all yours, not mine.”

Jungeun backed away slowly, looking for the woman's eyes and finding them. The usual gleam was there, but sadder; a gloomy version of Sooyoung which the blonde didn't expect to see so soon.

"If it's mine, then I want to share it with you." She reasoned, and it was one hundred percent true. Jungeun would never say she accepted the deal because of money or assets or a place in the high ranks. She accepted it because of Sooyoung.

"Okay.” The woman nodded to herself, a smirk on her lips. “When do I move in?” She joked, slowly twirling Jungeun’s hair with her fingers.

“Right now.” The blonde didn’t care if it was a joke or not, she was serious about this.

Sooyoung said nothing else, but of course she didn’t need to.

[...]

"I thought you wanted to eat out?" Sooyoung looked on, confused, as Jungeun fumbled with ingredients on the counters and googled recipes on her phone.

"I just got a brand new house, don't you think I should be enjoying it?" The blonde reasoned, but she really, _really_, was extremely clueless about that _really fancy looking_ induction cooker.

"Yes, but you'll be feeding me too."

Jungeun glanced behind her shoulder. The woman had a smartass grin on her lips, giving back the glance right away.

_Can she stop being hot for a second?_

"Beep beep, good point. Do you know how to do any of this?" Jungeun relented, smiling wide when Sooyoung approached slowly. The woman reached for a drawer right in front of the blonde, brushing her fingers on her quickly, almost as if it was as accident. But Jungeun knew it was no accident. Out of the drawer, Sooyoung took two aprons, both of them printed with _kiss the chef_ in bold letters.

Jungeun chuckled at this, but said nothing else as Sooyoung tied the apron around her waist, feeling oddly warm with the woman so close. Jungeun did the same to her, looping the lace carefully but losing concentration as her scrutiny turned into plain ogling.

_Ok, she has a nice ass too…_

"Jungeun?"

"Oh? Yeah, yeah, I'm done here." She cleared her throat, a little nervous that the woman would know what she was doing.

"Good. Give me your hand."

Jungeun did - and as soon as that, Sooyoung twirled her until they were back to front, with the woman locking Jungeun in place with a back hug. Sooyoung held the blonde's wrist with a soft grip, pushing her steadily to face the counter.

"This isn't hard- you know how to boil pasta, right?"

"Y-yeah.. yeah, I do." Jungeun didn't know why she was stuttering - _again_ \- and took a deep breath, rehearsing the movements in her head before she did them.

All the while, Sooyoung kept herself glued to her back, chin tucked where her neck and shoulder met, looking on with caring caution. She stepped in - _not literally, as she was already practically in the same reaching distance_ \- when necessary, teaching Jungeun how to turn on the induction cooker and wrapped her arms on Jungeun's waist when she felt the blonde had control of the recipe.

"It needs to be finely chopped. Don't cut yourself, okay? Be careful."

Jungeun rested the blade on the parsley leaves, and noticed her hands were trembling. But she had to do this. Properly.

_I have to. I have to succeed._

She began chopping the leaves, putting more force on her hands so they wouldn't tremble, but it only made it worse. The knife slipped, and before even Sooyoung could stop it, a gash had already formed; blood seeping out and dripping onto the cutting board.

The woman quickly grabbed Jungeun's injured hand, opening the faucet and cleaning the wound with a concerned look.

"I told you to be careful!" Sooyoung covered the finger with her own hand, pressing on it to block the blood flow. "Come on, I have a first aid kit in the bathroom."

Jungeun got dragged by the woman quickly, grimacing through the pain. _How could I be so stupid? I fucked up- I fucked everything up._

They found their way into the bathroom, a room Jungeun hadn't had the opportunity to visit before. But appreciating the shiny and clean tiles and huge bathtub which could probably fit Hulk inside was hard when your finger was bleeding the floors.

Sooyoung opened the medicine cabinet with her free hand, pulling out a beefy red box that looked excessive at best. She popped it open with dexterity, washing Jungeun's finger one more time on the previously untouched sink, and pressed some gauze on the cut, effectively stopping more blood from seeping out.

The woman bandaged everything up cleanly, inspecting her work with care. "Okay, I think you're going to be fine." Sooyoung muttered, still holding Jungeun's wrist, still very close to her. The bathroom was big, but it felt small to the blonde in that moment.

She still regretted ever getting in the situation in the first place, though.

"Are you mad at me?" Jungeun asked in a low voice, embarrassed to even be asking. _Why wouldn't anyone be mad at me? It seems like it happens a lot._

Sooyoung looked up at her, meeting her eyes. "Why would I be? You've made an honest mistake. I'm sorry I let it happen. I should have done something."

"There's nothing you could have done-"

"That's not true, Jungeun. I shouldn't have let you take the risk in the first place. Please forgive me."

Now the woman held Jungeun tightly, hands in the girl's shoulders, stare begging and even hurting. Jungeun took Sooyoung's hands from her shoulders, holding them with her own, not even feeling the pain in her finger anymore.

"I forgive you. Of course I do. Plus, I need someone to share that massive bathtub with.”

Sooyoung laughed, loud and heartfelt and beautiful.

“You have a great sales pitch. Maybe I should hire you.”

It was Jungeun’s time to laugh. Then, she clung to Sooyoung like a koala, memorizing her scent but still not letting go.

[...]

They were shopping for clothes again, this time in a refined outlet in Gangnam. Sooyoung was leaving for a business trip and wanted the blonde's opinion on what she should wear.

"It's only three days, so you don't need to worry." The woman reasoned, but there was nothing that would erase Jungeun's sulking.

"Is there a t-shirt around here that says 'I hate business trips'?" She browsed, stealthily avoiding Sooyoung's eyes when they tried to meet hers.

"Jungeun… come on, you know if I could, I would opt out of it."

The blonde knew. It didn't stop her from being mad about it, though.

Something stole her attention from the situation. It was a silk white dress, sleeveless with thin shoulder straps which gave it ample view to the collarbones of whoever wore it. And Jungeun just knew it was perfect for Sooyoung. Almost made for her. Not a small probability, given her fame.

She placed it inside the already quite filled store bag carefully, knowing the woman would never check everything before swiping her card, and smiled to herself, satisfied.

Jungeun couldn't wait to see her in that dress.

"Jungeun."

She turned to the woman, still fighting the smile on her face. _I'm supposed to be mad at her, not happy._

"What?"

"Did you hear me?" Sooyoung had a smile of her own, though. Jungeun had tuned everything else out, and maybe it hadn't been the wisest decision.

"Yeah- yeah, I heard you." She lied, thinking it would be easier to just figure everything out later.

_Oh boy, was she wrong._

And when the time came for Sooyoung to leave on her business trip, the silk dress was folded neatly at the bottom of her suitcase, together with a surprise written note from Jungeun.

_I hope you like it._

_Because I loved picturing you in it._

[...]

Jungeun woke up the morning after with a text, and not just a text. It was a text with a picture attached.

**Sooyoung:** I loved it.

**Sooyoung:** and I hope you like the picture.

The woman was posing perfectly, more beautiful than a model. Yep, there it was - ample view of her collarbones; cheeks rosy, lips hot pink and so _kissable_. Sooyoung held a rose, the same color as her cheeks, and her hair was tied back, strands of brown cascading down her face in waves, showcasing her breathtaking features.

“What the fuck…” Jungeun muttered, almost drooling. If that wasn’t the most beautiful woman in the world, she didn’t know who was.

Those three days were going to be torture.

Jungeun went back to the main menu in the messages app, clicking on Heejin’s conversation.

**Heejin:** bitch, please tell me you got some tea on your ceo gf

**Jungeun:** she’s on a business trip and I’m here alone

At least the anger was gone.

**Heejin:** aww poor bby

**Heejin:** how about you take that as an opportunity to talk to your actual friends

**Jungeun:** ouch you don’t need to be so rude

**Heejin:** sorry

**Heejin:** but for real, jiwoo’s been so fucking insufferable these days

**Heejin:** always sulking because you’re not around as much

**Jungeun:** I guess I shouldn’t be such a ghost

**Heejin:** yeah tell me about it

**Heejin:** since you’re not busy, then let’s have a proper hangout tomorrow

**Heejin:** no excuses

**Jungeun:** alright, I’ll go

**Heejin:** that’s my girl!

The conversation made Jungeun reflect. She was spending so much time these days with Sooyoung, it barely gave her any to talk to her friends. Of course she didn’t mean to disappear, but it still made her wonder. _Am I turning into a stuck up bitch?_

And then there was Jiwoo, her best friend. Her last messages said she was coming over, but Jungeun knew that never actually happened. She didn’t have the courage to go and ask what happened - what if she had seen the pictures? The ones stamped in the media? More and more, the possibility of it not happening was getting too small to handle.

For now, all Jungeun could do was wait.


	5. favOriTe

She was busy getting the bed arranged nicely when her phone buzzed. Jungeun fished it from her pocket and smiled when she saw who was calling.

“Hey, when are you arriving?” She couldn’t stop herself from sounding so happy; any kind of contact with Sooyoung would cause that reaction.

_“In a few hours. So, was it hard there without me?”_ Sooyoung’s tone was melodious, although tired. Jungeun sometimes forgot she had a busy CEO for a relationship.

“Oh, you don’t even know. Thanks for giving me a heart attack, by the way.”

_“Oh, the picture?”_ Sooyoung chuckled, amused. “_I thought you were going to like it._”

“I did. More than like, actually. You know why.”

_“No, I don’t?”_ The woman was clearly teasing Jungeun, but she couldn’t lie; she was loving it.

“Come on, you know you’re attractive as hell, right?”

Sooyoung could only laugh on the line, not answering the question.

“_So, I hope you packed your bags._” The woman trailed, almost as if she had said something simple, trivial.

“Wait, why?”

“Hah, I knew when I asked if you heard me, you actually didn’t. Pack, Jungeun. I have a free weekend and we’re going to New Zealand.”

The blonde didn’t know what to say.

_"There's a suitcase near the bed and a duffel inside the wardrobe. Warm clothes, ok?"_

Jungeun nodded, then almost slapped herself. _She won't see you nod, dumbass…_ "Okay. Got it."

"_I'll meet you at the airport._"

[...]

When Jungeun left the apartment, there was a black SUV waiting for her at the front, along with a familiar face holding a card with the blonde’s name on it.

“Hey, good to see you again.” Jinsol smiled, a hand raised in a frozen wave. “You must know why I’m here already, right?”

“Yeah, I would say it’s pretty obvious.” Jungeun laughed, which made Jinsol smile wider.

“Let me take this for you,” Jinsol took the suitcase and duffel from Jungeun’s hands, careful not to drop them. “go on in.”

Jungeun stepped inside the car, making herself comfortable on the passenger seat. There it was; _another golden opportunity_, she thought, her mind bringing her back to the conversation with Chaewon.

She waited for Jinsol to enter the vehicle, searching her brain for questions. The woman started the car after buckling up.

“Airport, right?” Jungeun tried to make small talk, still not sure how to segway the conversation into something more concrete.

“Yep, one hour drive. Plenty of time to gossip, I would say.” Jinsol rolled out with ease, a smile still plastered on her lips.

Jungeun laughed, agreeing. “Yep, plenty of time.”

Jinsol took a fast glance at her, spinning the steering wheel almost as if it took no thought process. “Come on Jungeun. I know you’re curious about her. Just ask, it’s okay.”

“Really? Is it that obvious?” She had a nervous smile, gripping the seatbelt just to have something to hold on to.

The woman just laughed, nodding lightly. “Yeah. Pretty obvious. And you should be asking questions, really.”

Jungeun’s thoughts spun around further. _Does she know? About what we are?_ “Did… did she tell you? About our… thing?”

Another quick glance. “She didn’t need to.”

Jinsol saw how Jungeun got quiet after that, and tried to lighten things up.

“Come on, it’s nothing. Besides, your business, not mine. Don’t blame my sick guessing skills.”

Jungeun laughed at this. “Alright. It’s okay. What is… what is she like? Just, her personality in general?”

Jinsol smiled wide at this. “She’s funny. Witty. But caring, too, with her employees. And assertive with the handshake, like a CEO should be. Sooyoung’s been doing this for a while, and she is good at it.”

It made sense. They were only beginning, but all of these sides had appeared, hidden in small actions or words coming from Sooyoung.

“How long have you been working in the company?"

"About as long as I can remember. When Sooyoung got passed the role, she..." Jinsol took a deep breath, almost as if she was preparing to say something she didn't like saying. "she sucked. She was horrible, to be honest. But you can't really blame her- Sooyoung wasn't prepared emotionally for it. She was fourteen, for crying out loud."

Jungeun took it all in slowly, eyes wandering but not really focused anywhere.

"I was there for her. As a friend, as a..." Jinsol trailed, but did not finish.

"What?"

"Nothing." She shook her head, dismissing it. "But now, you can see how she's evolved. Five years ago, I would never have thought Y Class would become the number one most influential company in the fashion industry."

"Well, there's a surprise for you." Jungeun quipped, but Jinsol's previous words lingered in her mind.

_What was she going to say?_

The curiosity might as well have been foreshadowing.

[...]

After Jinsol dropped her off at the airport, the girl had about half an hour to spare before Sooyoung arrived. She wanted to get something for the woman; after a business trip, Sooyoung must have been tired.

Jungeun looked through the duty free shops with a keen eye for anything with the de-stressing potential. She bought moisturizing creams, a few face masks, and chocolate covered biscuits (her particular favorites).

With bags full of goodies, as well as her personal belongings, she waited at the gate for Sooyoung, constantly checking if she was at the correct location.

All her worries vanished when she saw the woman. She was searching with her eyes, pulling her suitcase along without even thinking about it, much like someone who had been doing this before for a long time. The woman had her face partly covered by a mask, but as soon as she spotted Jungeun, her eyes started smiling.

Sooyoung strode quickly to meet her, closing her eyes as Jungeun hugged her. The woman pulled her mask with one hand to reveal a wide smile.

"Did you have a safe flight?" Jungeun asked, happy the three days without Sooyoung were over.

"As always. I've missed you, you know?" She was still smiling. _I've never seen her smile this wide. It's beautiful. The way her nose wrinkles softly, the way the corners of her lips rise and fall… the way she laughs? It's beautiful._

"I didn't know." Jungeun answered simply.

"Well, we have another flight to catch. I can see you've made good use of my credit card." Sooyoung laughed when Jungeun's expression turned to embarrassment, but the woman shooed it away. "Don't worry, I was expecting you to."

"... thanks?" The blonde answered tentatively, still embarrassed.

"You're welcome." Sooyoung placed a hand in her arm, lightly caressing it. "Come on. We have a gate to head to."

[...]

They were waiting in line to board the plane. Luckily, having a passport was a requirement in Jungeun's previous job - although she had never had to use it.

"Don't worry, you'll fill that in no time."

It wasn't a promise, but Jungeun hoped she would fulfill it nonetheless.

The plane was open for boarding. Slowly, people started walking through the tube that led to the plane, tickets in hand.

Jungeun and Sooyoung didn’t have to walk too far, as their seats were first class; of course, the blonde had expected as much.

“First class huh…” She muttered, looking at the leg room and commodities with sparkling eyes.

Sooyoung could only laugh, tapping her on the shoulder. “Come on, we’re in other people’s ways.”

“Can I have the window seat?” Jungeun asked, using her puppy eyes and maximum effort.

“You can,” Sooyoung started, a smile on curved lips. “but you’ll have to let me sleep on your shoulder.”

Jungeun looked at her with furrowed eyebrows, as if saying _really? Is that all?_

Sooyoung laughed, and urged her to sit down.

It took a few minutes, but finally, the plane started for the skies. Jungeun immediately felt the pressure and that sinking in the stomach. She closed her eyes, holding onto the seat’s arms. Jungeun felt a hand unclamping hers from the arm and intertwining with hers. When she opened her eyes, the sinking and the nerves were gone, but Sooyoung’s hand was still on hers.

“Are you okay?” Sooyoung asked, her voice a whisper compared to the plane’s pilot announcing the temperature and time, but still clear in the blonde’s ears.

“Y-yeah… I’m okay. Thanks.”

The woman smiled sweetly, urging Jungeun to look at the window with a gesture. And she did.

“Everyone turned into ants." She said nonchalantly, ignoring the way Sooyoung was staring at her - _or at least, trying._ "What? It's true."

"You're so cute."

Jungeun shook her head, but she could feel her cheeks and ears getting hotter.

The rest of the flight was quite uneventful, except for the fact the blonde indeed had to let Sooyoung _sleep on her shoulder. I would've done it for any friend,_ she tried to excuse, but of course that train of thought didn't work very effectively in her mind. More and more, Sooyoung was taking space of her own in Jungeun's life. Nothing short of expectations, but what Jungeun felt couldn't be expected or predicted from anyone.

They arrived in Auckland on a chilly afternoon, the skies clear but grey, hinting at rain. On the way out, Jungeun saw something she didn't fully expect - another card with their names on it. The person, however, did not look familiar.

Yet, Sooyoung seemed to know her - it made sense. The woman smiled wide, locking eyes and hugging whoever the other girl was. Seeing it gave Jungeun a pinch of jealousy, but of course she would never admit it.

"How are you? Thank you so much for coming."

"You're welcome, Sooyoung." She said, happily hugging the woman back. She retreated, now facing Jungeun, still a wide smile on her lips. "And you must be Jungeun?"

"Yeah," the blonde gave her a shy smile, not sure how to exchange pleasantries with the stranger. It reminded of the other run-ins with Sooyoung's employees. "that's me."

"I'm Kahei. Or you could call me just another glorified driver slash manager." Kahei laughed as Sooyoung's expression turned a fake sour. _Clearly an inside joke_, Jungeun imagined.

"Don't say that." Sooyoung pushed Kahei's shoulder, furrowing her eyebrows and pursing her lips.

Jungeun finally noticed the car behind Kahei - a simple, white Prius. She only broke out of her detail observant daze when Kahei and Sooyoung stopped talking and the latter approached the blonde, whispering in her ear.

"Sorry for not breaking out the limo," Sooyoung's voice was sweet and hush, and it made Jungeun inexplicably warm. "I think you understand why."

Jungeun nodded. Being lowkey, was ironically, key. Not the best part of being with a CEO, but the blonde couldn't really complain.

"Well, if you two still wanna enjoy your vacation, we gotta go." Kahei remarked, although she didn't seem too annoyed by the PDA.

And without further ado, they did.

[...]

The car ride was surprising enlightening for Jungeun, as some more things were revealed to her about Sooyoung and the company in general. The first was, the age seniority complex in Korea didn't matter much to her in terms of business. Proof of it was Kahei's own age - twenty three, meaning one year older.

One of Kahei's sentences had stuck to her. _Sooyoung doesn't care about that. She dropped the 'unnie' thing with me as soon as possible. She even makes fun of the way I run._

It made her laugh.

Second, things weren't always so fly with the employees either. Another sentence. _The reason I'm here and not in Korea is because there was some bad blood with another girl. She was the one who called me a glorified driver slash manager. It's kind of an inside joke now._

That one was interesting. Of course there would be conflicts Sooyoung wouldn't be able to solve no matter how much she tried.

To no one's surprise, not even Jungeun's, the reservations were ready by the time they arrived at the hotel. The blonde did notice it was not a standard hotel - more like a villa, with various housings.

Jungeun didn't know what she expected by the time Sooyoung turned the key. The first word which came to her mind was comfort. The second, polish. Everything just seemed neat and shiny and, well, expensive. But the blonde had grown to expect that by now (although most of her mind screamed _this is too excessive and I don't deserve it)_. It was instinct for her, and Jungeun didn't know if it would ever stop.

She immediately threw herself on the bed, feeling sore and tired and jetlagged. Her mind quickly went back to that place.

_If I feel like this, imagine what Sooyoung must be feeling… I gotta stop being selfish._

Jungeun sat up, stealthily watching Sooyoung as she unpacked a few things. The blonde got up from the bed, slowly walking to the woman. She wrapped her arms around her and squeezed tight enough to get a surprised squeal in return.

She laughed as Sooyoung turned to her, staring with forged anger which quickly turned into a smile. The woman hugged her back, looking into her eyes silently as they waltzed around the room.

"Aren't you tired?" Jungeun asked in a low voice; it did not matter if they were alone, it just felt right.

"I'm always tired," Sooyoung answered in the same volume, brushing the blonde's hair back with her fingers. "and it's okay. We should still go and enjoy the rest of the day while it lasts."

Jungeun nodded, relenting and agreeing. By the time they left the house, she already had a good idea of what to do to repay all the piled up favors.

[...]

The day was growing colder, quickly turning to night. No matter what, the couple tried all the street food possible; from simple glazed bagels to the famous Hokey Pokey ice cream. Needless to say, they were having a great time.

"So, why New Zealand?" Jungeun asked, swinging their connected hands as they walked the streets of Auckland.

Sooyoung looked at her, squeezing her hand just a tiny bit, but enough to convey her affection for the girl. "Because it's safe. And beautiful. And also, because it's liberal enough that I can do this."

The woman kissed her, just on the corner of her mouth, and quick and sweet enough to leave Jungeun wanting more. She couldn't contain her happiness at that moment, behaving like a giddy teenager in love.

If Jungeun had asked herself at that moment if she was in love, the answer would probably be too complex and poetic that she wouldn't understand it that well herself.

She scooted closer to Sooyoung, as close as she could get, smiling broadly when the woman put their intertwined hands on her pocket to warm them up.

They walked back to the villa on their own pace, stealing glances at each other all the way through; unaware of the world around them.

Sooyoung turned the key quickly and they entered the house with their hands still connected. She let out a sigh of relief, shaking her legs to let go of the tension of walking so intensely.

"So you're that tired." Jungeun pointed out, laughing.

The woman smiled, closing her eyes and stretching her arms out. "I seriously could wear my shoes double the size."

Jungeun walked quickly to her things rested by the bed, immediately remembering the products she had purchased in the airport hours ago. She fished out a bottle of oil - its label said it was particularly good for massages.

Sooyoung eyed the bottle in her hand, and immediately smirked. "Ooh. A present for me?"

The blonde chuckled. "Come on, don't be silly." Jungeun uncapped the product and motioned for the woman to approach. "Take off your shirt."

Jungeun hadn't considered the implications in her sentence before actually saying it, and before she could reiterate anything, Sooyoung was already doing as asked.

She took a deep breath before spreading some of the oil in her hand, rubbing her hands together. Jungeun didn't even dare to look at Sooyoung's back unless she really had to.

Right now, she had to.

The blonde started on the shoulders, swallowing thick as Sooyoung tied her hair in a bun to free the way. Her skin was fair, free of blemishes except for a few small moles here and there. Her bra was black, fitted perfectly on the back - and probably on the front too, but Jungeun wouldn't dare to check now.

She slid her hands through her neck once, twice, going down her shoulders and squeezing the soft skin on her arms. She could hear Sooyoung's small murmurs of approval - those were beginning to swim in her ears.

Jungeun traced the lines on her back with her fingers, sliding her hands below the bra's horizontal strap to massage more skin. Slowly, as she felt comfortable with it, the blonde's hands got more daring, as she stepped closer to Sooyoung, backhugging her just as the woman had done back on her apartment. She rubbed her hands on her stomach, feeling the small, but noticeable dips on her skin with the tips of her fingers. Her hands reached just below the woman's covered breasts, sliding her fingers and feeling the muscles there. Jungeun moved her hands up her sides, going back to her arms and ending on her wrists.

She kissed her shoulder, and airily whispered "all done.", hugging her tight.

_I damn well know we aren't done._

Sooyoung slowly undid the back hug, turning to Jungeun with a pleased, but still somehow puzzling look in her eyes. She had her hands on the blonde's waist, lightly caressing it with her fingers.

"I'm only going to ask you once, and you need to tell me honestly," her words were low, her stare unbreakable. "do you want this, Jungeun?"

Jungeun wanted it. She knew full well.

"Yeah." A short answer was enough, as her body was already bubbling from the waist down.

Sooyoung gave her a small smile before kissing her. Unlike previous kisses, it was different; slower, but hungrier in nature. The woman bit her lip, lifting Jungeun's shirt to explore the skin below.

The blonde didn't require a command before taking it off herself, lunging back to Sooyoung's lips. The kissing got faster, as their tongues met. The dominance was unclear. Jungeun moaned as the woman's mouth moved up her jaw, peppering sensitive skin with kisses while unclasping her bra with deft hands. The piece of clothing got quickly discarded, and Sooyoung sucked on a point in her neck, leaving a small mark.

The woman looked at Jungeun with a questioning stare, receiving a quick nod before working on her nipples. Her whole body was already aflame, but just as a mouth ghosted over one pink areola, Jungeun knew things were about to get hotter. She moaned louder as Sooyoung sucked on her nipple, playing with the other mound, filling her hands with it.

Jungeun hissed as Sooyoung's tongue circled the areola, burning between the legs with pleasure. When the woman had made sure the mounds were well taken care of, she returned to Jungeun's mouth, welcoming her tongue on hers. Sooyoung pushed the girl to the bed, making her sit down on the edge while she stripped her of her jeans.

"Are you okay?" She muttered, pulling the last leg out, her eyes caring as they stared at Jungeun.

"Y-yeah." The girl nodded, now almost fully naked. "I am."

Sooyoung smiled before stripping her own clothing and revealing more of the perfect body Jungeun had imagined. She sat beside the blonde, slowly kissing her again, grabbing her hands and motioning for her to remove her bra. Jungeun did, marvelously amazed at how perky and perfect her breasts were.

"I know, they're pretty awesome." Sooyoung made her laugh, breaking the rest of the tension that still remained between them. She laid her down on the bed, peppering her lips and skin with kisses that were softer, more careful.

Yet another questioning stare, yet another nod. Sooyoung didn't stop kissing her then, as her hand reached below, snaking under the panties and lightly caressing the bud.

Jungeun moaned against her mouth, letting out quick breaths, and Sooyoung smiled against her lips before kissing her again, slowly circling the bundle of nerves with her index finger. The blonde moaned louder as she quickened the pace, rubbing her clit with haste. The woman kissed the corner of her lips while teasing her entrance with her middle finger, which produced another, shorter moan.

"Ah- fuck..." Jungeun muttered, and Sooyoung's middle and ring fingers slid easily inside, coated with wetness.

She gave the clit another rub, working around it. "Ah-, f-faster.." Jungeun moaned, and it was music to her ears. Quickly, she began pumping her fingers, attending the blonde's wish.

Sooyoung kissed her earlobe as Jungeun's pulse quickened, as her moans became louder and more high-pitched.

"I'm gonna com- ah-"

Sooyoung kissed her jaw as she throbbed in her fingers, her walls closing in and tightening around them as the woman curled her digits.

And Sooyoung kissed her as she came, continued kissing her as she rode down her high, sweat dripping onto the sheets.

Jungeun kept her eyes closed, still releasing labored breaths, and reached for Sooyoung's hand, sucking her coated fingers and releasing them from her mouth with an audible pop. The woman kissed her, tasting her flavor with pleasure. The blonde smiled sweetly at her, her breathing finally settling to a slow pace.

They cuddled in each other's arms after a quick shower to clean up, Jungeun slowly tracing the lines on Sooyoung's hand, feeling light and at peace.

"You know, this would be the time where I would light up a cigarette," the woman trailed, which made Jungeun frown. "but I've let go of that vice a long time ago."

The blonde looked up at her, questioning if that was true.

"I know. I shouldn't have picked it up in the first place. It's in the past, so you don't have to worry."

_Too late. I already worry._

Sooyoung slowly brushed her fingers through Jungeun's lightly damp hair, resting her head on the blonde's own. "Where did you learn all that?"

Jungeun chuckled, a bit shy. "I've had my run ins. My first time with a girl was in high school. Same with a guy, but it never actually happened- he sucked at foreplay."

"Which basically means he didn't do any." The woman remarked, and accurately as well.

"Yeah. And I wasn't into it anyway, so..." Jungeun raised her palms side by side, making an expression that said _what can you do about it?_, which made Sooyoung laugh.

They stayed in silence, breathing so calmly it was hard to hear if you were far away. Jungeun could feel Sooyoung's pulse, slow and strong. It made her smile. The woman she was with today had definitely seen some shit, but still, came out on top (_snicker)_. Jungeun felt inexplicably proud.

She fell asleep while Sooyoung's arms were still around her, their hands clasped together.

_Out of all my relationships, she's definitely my favorite._


	6. love letter

Jungeun wakes up early, her skin chilly because of the cold morning. It's about seven, and Sooyoung is still asleep. The blonde grabs a random shirt off the floor and Sooyoung's long coat, covering herself and opening the french doors leading to the outside deck. The cold weather wakes up her senses and she rests her arms on the wooden railing, thoughtful.

The blonde was about to turn and go back when arms snaked around her waist and Sooyoung rested her chin on her shoulder, kissing her cheek. "Why are you up so early?" She asked, voice still groggy.

"I always am."

Sooyoung laughed as if it was a joke, squeezing Jungeun and placing butterfly kisses on her shoulder and neck. "Come inside. It's freezing."

Jungeun did, as she would never refuse an offer such as that. They waltzed through the room again, both not wearing pants, smiling and laughing and exuding that mysterious and beautiful after-sex glow.

"I think we should go get breakfast. They have a restaurant in the villa, and I heard it’s pretty good.”

“Okay.” Jungeun smiled.

She would go wherever if it meant Sooyoung was with her.

This time, they dressed appropriately, once again wearing long coats for warmth, and stood close to each other while walking to the villa's restaurant. Thankfully, they were still serving breakfast.

They sat on a table close to a window, much opposite to the first time they ate together. Here, it was fine to be a little more open, and Jungeun was extremely thankful for it. No white-collared idiots staring at them either, just energetic and good-hearted laughter ringing through the ambient.

Jungeun ate happily, taking a minute to share bites of her waffle with Sooyoung, dipping hash browns in sauce and just generally not being what you would call a classy eater. Sooyoung showed no complaints at this, actually beaming at Jungeun.

"You really were hungry." Sooyoung remarked, watching the blonde down her glass of orange juice.

"Exercise makes me hungry," Jungeun pointed out with a smirk, which made Sooyoung… blush? _Oh. This is new. And I like it._ "isn't it the same with you?"

"No comment." The woman rolled her eyes playfully, a small smile on her lips.

They went back to the house with full stomachs and secretive smiles. Jungeun took a deep breath as they finally stepped through the doors, messy sheets on the bed acting as another reminder of the things they had done the night before.

Her mind wandered and her mouth opened with no hesitation.

"Have you done this before?"

Jungeun waited with baited breath as Sooyoung stared at her, brows furrowed. _That's different too. But I'm not so sure if I like it…_

"Done what?"

"Exchange gifts for sex."

The blonde didn't mean to say it so crudely, but masking and sweetening words wouldn't do anything now. Even if Sooyoung looked like she had just been slapped.

"I'm sorry, I don't understand-"

"Come on, you understand perfectly." She cut her off, getting impatient. Her hands closed into fists without her knowledge. Her tone was comical, yet serious.

Sooyoung exhaled through her nose, her expression blank like deer caught in headlights.

"I-I don't want to talk about this with you right now, Jungeun." She stuttered the words, something Jungeun had never heard before. There was no pizazz, no grace, nothing that reminded the blonde of the usual Ha Sooyoung.

Something was off.

Jungeun stared at her for a while, wordless. Everything was going so well… for a minute, she even regretted asking the question. But her mind threw it back, saying _you need to ask questions. Nothing is ever going to be perfect, and it doesn't have to be. Stop trying to make this a fairy tale because it's not._

_It never will be a fairy tale._

She made the bed to brush at least some of the anger and doubt away, glancing at a stone-like Sooyoung from time to time. Jungeun couldn't read her; not like she could ever read her, but this time, it was like the woman was just a deactivated robot waiting for its next orders.

The blonde patted the white sheets excessively until they were free of wrinkles, pacing around the bed until she was sure it was perfect. When there was nothing left to clean, Jungeun threw herself on the couch and picked up her phone. Maybe her friends would have something cheerful to tell her - and maybe, just maybe, Jiwoo would give her a sign that she was still her friend.

_Or maybe I don't deserve friends right now._

"If you wanna go home early, I can book tickets." She heard Sooyoung's voice echo in her mind, dismissing it for the time being. Right now Jungeun was focused on the oncoming messages which she couldn't even read because they were so fast.

**Jiwoo:** jungeun

**Jiwoo:** please dont be with her

**Jiwoo:** i dont know what she said to you, but its not worth it

**Jiwoo:** please

**Jiwoo:** i know this from experience, shell only break you. not only your heart, really, really break you

**Jiwoo:** please believe me

**Jiwoo:** i just wanna protect you

**Jiwoo:** im sorry i couldnt do it earlier. i only saw the photos now.

**Jiwoo:** she must be treating you so right there right?

**Jiwoo:** god im sorry.

**Jiwoo:** because it wont be like that forever.

**Jiwoo:** and i know you must be falling for her already. i know you too well

**Jiwoo:** im sorry i let it happen

**Jiwoo:** im sorry i let the same thing that happened to me happen to you

Jungeun let the phone fall from her hands. She soon realised they were shaking, and not lightly either. Her eyes were welling up with tears. She didn't know what to do, except to stay there, frozen, the past going through her mind like an old film, scene through scene. Was that why Sooyoung hesitated so much? Because she knew? She knew Jiwoo?

Her lips were trembling too.

"I- Uh-" Jungeun's inability to speak was fucking her up again. _God fuckin' damnit, oh my fucking god…_ "Y-you knew h-her??" There was desperation in her words, even if she couldn't speak them as loud as she wanted to.

_It was never a fucking fairy tale._

"Jungeun?? Are you crying?" Sooyoung ran to her, kneeling in front of the blonde and taking her hands.

"Y-you knew Jiwoo..." Jungeun grabbed the woman's shoulders, not lightly this time, but really digging the tips of her fingers into them. She shook the woman, tears still streaking down her face. "Y-YOU KNEW HER!" She couldn't open her eyes this time, sobbing louder and louder. "Why didn't you just t-tell me… I was… I loved you.."

"Jungeun." Sooyoung tried to take the girl's hands, but she was so strong, gripping her shoulders tight. "I'm sorry..."

"What did you do to her..." Jungeun murmured. "when- when she was hiding things from me… in high school- it was- it was you?" The blonde shoved Sooyoung, once, then twice. "You made her cry.. you made her almost k-kill herself..."

She was on top of her, small teardrops falling on Sooyoung's face as Jungeun still pushed her down. Finally, her strength wavered and she let go, getting up and wiping her face.

"... this is fucking crazy- all of this is fucking crazy."

Needless to say, they spent the rest of the morning separate from each other.

[...]

"Hey. Good afternoon." Kahei waved as she stepped closer to the two, who were standing on the sidewalk a bit far from each other. Actually, very far. "Or… not good afternoon."

None of them spared much of a word to her, except for Sooyoung. "Please, not right now." The woman muttered as she helped her put the suitcases in the car.

This time, the drive to the airport was quiet as a mouse. Kahei could feel the tension in the air, and nothing that came up in her mind seemed like something which would break it. It didn't help that the two didn't even sit together.

"That fight must've been pretty intense..." she murmured without meaning to, silently apologizing to Sooyoung when she glared at her, receiving her dagger eyes with regret.

Kahei helped with the suitcases again, and as they were finishing up, she pulled Sooyoung to the side for a minute.

"You better fix whatever bullshit this is. I've never seen you look so miserable."

Those were her last words to Sooyoung. And the woman's last words to her?

"I will."

The determination was very clear this time.

[...]

Jungeun felt relieved they didn't have to sit on the same row this time; she wasn't sure being close to Sooyoung would be good for her wellbeing. Being honest, she wasn't sure about anything at all. She felt sick to her stomach, and not having the woman comforting her might've been a double-edged sword. When she looked down at her hands, they still trembled slightly, as if reminded of the previous trauma.

She took a deep breath as the plane ascended, trying not to focus on the memories that surged out of the blue; Sooyoung's graceful demeanor, Sooyoung's careful personality, Sooyoung's everything, really. It was just hitting her - the woman wasn't perfect. She had never been, but those parts were well hidden.

Well, now they were in plain sight.

_And to think I've let her have me this fast._

The flight went as quickly as it could, and Jungeun distracted herself as best as she could. Time continued on its paved road as they shared a taxi, and she could feel it approaching. They would have to speak to each other again at some point. Jungeun just didn't know if she would like it to be now.

As the door to her apartment closed them off from the rest of the world, she noticed time didn't care about her likings.

"I know, Jungeun. I know I've done you wrong. I- I can't undo that. And… and I know Jiwoo told you everything and more about me, and us."

She tried to tune it out as best as she could, hanging her coat and pacing around the apartment as Sooyoung followed her.

"Just let me tell you what I should have told you in the beginning."

Jungeun snapped at this. _Oh, right now? You didn't think to do this a bit earlier?_ She bit her tongue and forced her eyes shut.

"I don't wanna fucking know." She muttered instead, noticing the crevices and wrinkles in the sheets more and more. _This is all fucking wrong. All fucking messy and wrong._

"You don't have to believe me, or even look at me. Please." The blonde looked at her, and Sooyoung had her fingers together in a praying position. Begging. "Just listen."

Jungeun didn't want to. But more and more, she felt inclined to hear what the woman had to say. How would she excuse almost killing someone? How would she excuse everything?

So she sat, and listened.

"As you know, I've met Jiwoo when she was in high school. When you two were in high school, I suppose." Sooyoung sat on the opposite end of the bed, her eyes fixed on her lap. "I instantly liked her. She just had… this magnetic personality, I guess. And at the time, I was just getting the hang of the CEO position. I was starting to clear the way, make space for the company. The stocks finally rising instead of staying or falling."

"Having someone to count on that time was… was exhilarating, I must say. We didn't have the same… arrangement as you and me," her eyes met hers for a brief moment, but then went back to her lap. "but we had something special. Something good, really good."

"Jiwoo kept me grounded, Jungeun. I wouldn't have made some big decisions without her. It was just, impossible. Whenever the going got tough, she was the one I came running to. I… I loved her. I did. Which made the next moments more difficult than anything else in my entire life. Even the CEO position."

"My family… they found out. They were obviously against it. Not just because of where we live, but because of my position. The company was rising, and they were afraid a scandal would send it all the way back down. They had me break it off. Threatened me and my closest friend at the time. You know her."

_Jinsol._

"And I was stuck in limbo. I didn't want to break anything off. But they had my neck on a noose, and I couldn't do anything. I tried so hard to convince them not to do this, that Jiwoo would never say anything, but they wouldn't believe me. They were dead set. So I made the worst decision in my life."

"I read Jiwoo the script they fed me. I told her I didn't want her. Told her I hated her. Told her I was just using her. We had just slept together, Jungeun. For the first time. Our first time, and I did that. I crushed her while she laid there, motionless. As my family demanded I said those words. As my heart shattered, and hers did too."

Sooyoung was crying now, but she was fighting it as hard as she could.

"I cut all contact with her after that, and my family was satisfied as the company kept rising. They stalked me for weeks, months, threatening me so I wouldn't try and reach out. I wanted to… at least send her help. A counselor I trusted. But they said any form of contact would reach suspicions, and they couldn't have that."

"I can't heal her. Not even if I tried, right now. She must have told you; I broke her. Because I did. That's the truth. I didn't mean to, but meaning doesn't matter."

"What about Jinsol?"

Sooyoung took a deep breath. "Even with therapy, which my parents were against, I was losing my mind. Jinsol was my escape valve. I slept with her to let off steam. It was never a relationship, not a regular one, anyway. No feelings, just mutual trust. We ended it when I felt it was right."

"Jungeun, I can't convince you I won't do the same to you. I can tell you right now, my family is no longer involved in the company or in my life. I cut them out long ago. I can never promise you I won't break your heart, or even you, for the matter. But I really want you to stay. If you wanna change the terms, I'm all up for it. I just… really need you. I really want this, us, to be a thing."

Jungeun closed her eyes. Everything was just so much to take in one sitting, and even with the hours and the breaks, her mind was going a thousand miles per hour. She wanted to believe Sooyoung - her heart broke for Jiwoo. It was like a battle already lost, and Jungeun was just laid there on the trenches, waiting for someone to finish her off and end her misery.

"... I don't know… I really, don't know, Sooyoung. I really like you, but the things you've done to Jiwoo… I don't know if I can forgive you. If I can… trust you."

Sooyoung nodded solemnly, her eyes not gleaming with tears anymore, but grave and still, staring at nothing at all.

"Okay. If that's what you want, I'll leave. I promise."

Jungeun felt her stomach dropping, her heart tightening as she said the words.

"Yes. I want you to leave." She pressed her lips together, closing her eyes shut, trying to ignore the heavy steps that distanced from her at every second. She fought against the knee-jerk reaction of jumping from the bed and running to her, telling her she changed her mind. Jungeun fought against it until she heard the door click shut.

But she didn't fight against the tears.


	7. let me in

She closed the door with every bit of hesitation trembling in her hands. Her cheeks were still streaked with tears but her eyes no longer cried. Sooyoung cleared her throat and fixed her disheveled appearance, forcing herself to go back and act normally. Her normal, at least.

And her normal, was mysterious. Walled in, hidden. Not an open book, not even close. Head up high, never looking down. Posture straight, steps confident and unfaltering.

But she didn’t feel confident inside. Sooyoung felt broken, because everything she didn’t want happening, happened. The last thirteen minutes were playing back on repeat in her mind, reminding her of how much she had fucked up.

And also, how much past memories hurt.

Without a second thought, Sooyoung dialed the familiar number. She was in need of her escape valve.

[...]

Sooyoung watched curiously as Jinsol buttoned her shirt back up. She had this puzzling look on her face. Back when they first slept together - years ago, really -, it was there; but this time, way more apparent.

"What is it?" Sooyoung asked, tired of the mystery.

"Nothing. You just called me suddenly, is all." Jinsol brushed her hair back nonchalantly.

"You do that when you are hiding something from me. Come on, just come clean."

Jinsol sighed. "I was just thinking… do you still..."

_Miss her?_, she didn't need to listen to the rest to know what Jinsol was talking about.

"I'm over Jiwoo, if that's what you're asking."

Sooyoung turned away, afraid her face would give away her feelings. Yes, she was over Jiwoo - after all, years did pass by. But she couldn't shake this unsettling feeling from her skin. This chill-inducing sentiment that some things were still left unresolved.

"Don't you think it's time you actually talk to me, Sooyoung? Finally say whatever you've been bottling up for so long?"

Goosebumps spread through her back and arms, and she covered her mouth to stop it from moving.

"You have to talk to me. God fucking damnit Sooyoung, I can't just be the toy you use and throw away when it starts bothering you."

She closed her eyes - which started welling with tears - as Jinsol's words rang in her head. They were true, and the truth hurt; even more now when she was already at the brink, at the edge.

Sooyoung took a deep breath, blinking rapidly so the water would go away. "I almost killed her, Jinsol. I'm a monster."

Jinsol reached and touched her shoulder, but her touch wasn't comforting. "You wanted to help."

"But I didn't." Sooyoung muttered, brushing her hand away. "Thoughts don't matter. Actions do. I ruined her life."

"Do you feel bad? Hey, look at me," Jinsol forced her to look up, at her eyes. "do you feel sorry?"

Her heart broke every time she thought about Jiwoo. "... yes," she breathed out, as hard as she could. It was only but a whisper.

"Then say it. Not to me, or even to Jungeun - even though she deserves it too. Say it to her, Sooyoung."

"... I can't."

_Because seeing Jiwoo again would hurt too much._

"Okay, okay. Look at me. You're Ha Sooyoung. Not the CEO of Y Class, not the businesswoman. Ha Sooyoung."

It had been a while since she was Ha Sooyoung.

"Tell me about Jungeun. From Ha Sooyoung's perspective." The specifics made it harder, because the images now flashing were way too vivid and clear, colorful and happy.

As difficult as things now were, her feelings for Jungeun were the simplest thing to figure out.

"She's… she is special. She has all these quirks- like her way of always needing everything neatly arranged, or her smile- which is just the sweetest thing I've ever seen."

Just thinking about it made her smile. But it was bittersweet because she had hurt her too.

“Do you love her, Sooyoung?”

“I… I feel something. But I don’t know if it’s love.”

Jinsol looked at her with graveness in her eyes, but said nothing about it.

"You know it doesn't need to be. Nothing needs to be exact. But if you care about her, you should be doing this. You should be fixing things." Jinsol sighed at the way her eyes darkened, and shook her shoulders once. "Yes! It will hurt! It's supposed to hurt! _Wake up, Sooyoung! Wake up and face what you've done!"_

She fell back as the words ran through her mind over, and over again. Her body was surrounded with water, and then, it made sense.

_I'm someplace else. In the water._

Sooyoung started sinking down, not struggling at all as the water encased her, bubbles of air rising to the surface as she sank.

_I'm drowning. I am sinking and drowning._

Her back hit the pool's bottom, and Sooyoung stuck her arm up as she started losing her breath. The surface seemed so far away, that it was.

_Too far away now_, she concluded, letting go of the weight in her body. But the memories exploding like fireworks wouldn't go away, no matter how much water she inhaled into her lungs.

The thought of Jiwoo crying again pulled her back to the surface. Because no matter how much evil she'd dealt unto the caramel-haired girl, Jiwoo would have never given it back; and more, she would be the one most sorrowful.

Sooyoung coughed out what felt like liters of water, brushing away droplets from her face as she catched her breath back again.

"I'm going to regret doing this..." she muttered as she pulled herself out, drawing a plan in her mind.

_But I am going to regret it more if I don't._

[...]

She breathed slowly to try and calm herself down. Her foot was tapping incessantly against the porch boards, and nothing would settle her heart into a more reasonable pace. She knocked on the door, rapping her knuckles against hardwood four times.

Sooyoung closed her eyes for a second, waiting. _Maybe no one is home. Maybe I'm just hopeless._

Instead, the door did open, albeit slowly. She instantly recognized the woman; Jiwoo's mom. They had the same smile, the kindest smile at all times. But when she finally recognized Sooyoung, her smile vanished - turned into contempt.

"It's you." The woman muttered, eyeing Sooyoung with a puzzled look on her face. "You're different, but it's you."

Sooyoung nodded, remembering the memories she had also shared with Jiwoo's mother. Talking about her daughter, bonding over her childhood pictures… she looked fondly over those memories. The way the woman was always supportive of their relationship, always protective over Jiwoo… Sooyoung sometimes had begged to whatever deity was hearing for parents like that.

"Yes. It's me."

"It's been so long, Sooyoung-ah. You should have come sooner." The contempt finally faded from her pursed lips, which turned into a smile. The woman stepped closer, finally wrapping Sooyoung in a hug. She fought the tears and hugged her back, cherishing the woman's kindness.

_I don't deserve it. I never did._

"I know, Mrs. Kim. I'm sorry for taking so long."

They went inside the familiar house, more recollections hitting Sooyoung as she observed the small change in details, and the majority which hadn't changed at all. The house was still comfortable, homey, drenched in good thoughts and good things.

But not all of it was good, and Sooyoung knew that very well.

"Do you want some water? Tea, coffee?" Ms. Kim offered, quickly browsing through her cabinets.

"Water is fine, thank you."

Sooyoung sat down, fiddling with her clothes as the minutes passed. Her nerves were probably clear to the woman; Sooyoung realized it as she watched her sit directly opposite and eye her with clear concern.

"You're here because of Jiwoo." Ms. Kim remarked. Of course it wasn't a question, because of course - she knew everything too. And the more people knew, the more people Sooyoung had hurt.

She hated hurting people, these particularly.

"Yes," Sooyoung nodded gravely, almost as if the damage had been done only yesterday. She found herself reflecting even more, understanding with more insight, that she had almost killed Jiwoo.

Those had been Jungeun's words, and she knew everything too.

And so on, the tally of people Sooyoung had hurt continued to rise.

"She's not home, but I'm sure you've noticed that already."

"I want to apologize. And you deserve an apology too. I did all the wrong things when I couldn't afford to, and I lost everything I cared about the most. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I caused you and your family pain when you'd least deserved it."

Ms. Kim smiled simply, but she was clearly tearing up.

"Of course I accept your apology, Sooyoung. I know you didn't ever mean to harm Jiwoo, and I'm sorry too. For not reaching out myself." The woman looked down, wiping her eyes and drinking her glass of water.

"But you can't say Jiwoo will."

The woman was about to respond when the front door creaked open, and right with it, came Jiwoo. For a second she didn't even notice Sooyoung, as her attention was at locking the door with her keys.

"Hey mom-" she muttered absentmindedly, until her eyes finally registered the situation.

And when they did, she froze. Just like that day, that day where she had exchanged stares with Sooyoung, still like a statue in a museum.

Sooyoung got up, out of habit, but froze. Jiwoo's mom seemed to notice, also getting up and heading for her daughter - probably to help her. Definitely to help her.

But it didn't seem to be enough.

"What the fuck is she doing here??" Jiwoo asked, her tone not at all pleasant, but snarky and desperate.

"I'm here to apologize-" Sooyoung started, but she never got the chance to finish.

"Apologize?? For what? For fucking what??" Her eyes were all of a sudden bloodshot, her whole body shivering like the cold had just hit her.

"Jiwoo, please honey..." Her mother took her arms in her hands, pushing Jiwoo away as further as she could, holding her and trying to calm her down. "Breathe, okay? Breathe."

Jiwoo did, but her breaths were short and quick and loud, like a bull's. Her ears which had become reddened started back to their original color. She swallowed thick, still staring at Sooyoung, but her stare was sadder, less angry.

Her breathing calmed, and Mrs. Kim let go of her arms, feeling it was safe to do so.

"She's here to apologize, honey. Nothing else. So please, listen." That was her mother's last request before leaving the two alone in the room.

The girl looked at Sooyoung questioningly, like she was confirming if what her mother had said was true. So Sooyoung nodded, silently because she was afraid to speak and spew all the wrong things at once.

"You… you don't need to accept my apology, Jiwoo. I won't ever force you to. But I need to say it, or else I'll never forgive myself." She spoke slowly, tentatively trying to measure the atmosphere with a gentle tone. Jiwoo seemed to be okay with it, as far as she could tell. So she continued.

"I am sorry for all the pain I have caused, to you and your family. I am sorry I did not reach out earlier… I should have done it sooner. I am sorry I disappeared after hurting you like I did, and I'm sorry it was my fault you almost took your own life. I'm so sorry Jiwoo, because my apology will never make up for everything I did."

There was silence after Sooyoung's long apology, but she was satisfied after saying it all and her heart was pumping like never before.

“Are you still planning to be with Jungeun?” The question Sooyoung was dreading the most turned out to be the one which came out in the simplest way possible.

She took a deep breath, hoping for the best, but expecting the worst.

“Would you hate me if I said yes?”

Jiwoo smiled, but it was a smile void of happiness or any other emotion.

“So you are.” The girl concluded, finally. Not that it was hard to deduce, anyway; Sooyoung thought Jiwoo knew more than she let on.

"I suppose I don't have your blessing, then." Sooyoung pursed her lips, frustrated at herself for causing all of the events that unfolded. She couldn't help but curse herself over it.

Jiwoo shook her head. "I just… I don't want you to hurt her like you hurt me."

She felt the stab right through her heart, but tried not to show it; keeping her focus on the ground instead of on Jiwoo, trying to keep her chaotic feelings at bay.

_I have to be honest. This is the only thing I can do now_. "I can't make sure I won't. But at this point, it's all up to her. Because Jungeun told me she wanted me to leave."

"And you did."

Sooyoung took a deep breath and blinked the tears away, remembering that one painful moment again. She nodded.

"What about your family? Aren't they against that?"

"They no longer associate with the company or the brand, and I personally begged them to never come back."

The ambient was still riddled with tension, but it had lightened up a good amount and Jiwoo no longer seemed mad or resentful.

"Sooyoung." Jiwoo beckoned her attention suddenly as Sooyoung was thinking how to fix the remaining damage.

"Hm?"

"I can't say you have my blessing… but I can't stop you. And I won't stop her either. But if you hurt her… I will come for you, guns blazing. Okay?"

Sooyoung laughed for the first time in a while.

"Yes, madam."

"Please, drop it." Jiwoo rolled her eyes, annoyed, but she had a smile on her face. "Sooyoung?"

"Yeah?"

"You… you didn't mean any of those words, then?"

Jiwoo had her puppy eyes full on display, and it made Sooyoung's heart ache harder. No, she hadn't meant any of them. The actual words she wanted to say had been buried inside, guarded by thick walls no one could crack.

She shook her head. Without second thoughts, Sooyoung walked closer to the girl and hugged her. That barrier had been there for a while, and now, it only felt natural to cross it. The tension broke, and Sooyoung released a long sigh of relief when Jiwoo hugged her back.

"I hope we can be friends again someday." Sooyoung muttered, patting the girl's back as a final goodbye as she backed out from the hug.

Without Sooyoung being aware of it, one of the thin layers of ice in her heart had melted. There were still ways to go, but it didn't feel that far away as it had before.

She just hoped the rest of the road wasn't too far gone.


	8. twilight

Jungeun just couldn't close her eyes. Or rather, she would close them, but then the darkness would hit her most primitive senses and she would spring them back up, unable to keep them shut for more than a second.

She took a sip of the coffee, which had turned cold more than half an hour ago, and banged her forehead on the table, defeated. To make things worse, it was basically impossible to try and forget things like Sooyoung when she was fully enveloped in everything the woman had ever done for her. The house, the clothes, everything.

It frankly sucked to feel this close to someone and then have it ripped away, just like that. Jungeun just couldn’t predict when the anxiety would go away, and thinking about it only plagued what was already sick to begin with.

_It can't be that I'm awake just because of her. It's just too much going on in my life. It's not just her._

But when Jungeun looked at the almost full cup, she knew it was a lie. Nothing else would convince her that it was not a lie.

She looked at herself in the mirror for a second and despised what she saw. Deep, dark circles beneath her eyes denounced her sleeping habits to her, and to anyone who would see. Jungeun kept herself inside, opening the door only to take whatever deliveries she had placed before.

Jungeun kept her feelings inside too. In particular, those she wanted to bury deep and forget about, but could not. Those about Sooyoung.

_Why would you fall in love now, you idiot? Why fucking now?_

And then there was the memories too. Including, the one where they fucked.

The frustration kept piling up on Jungeun, and she didn't know what to do. So she did the only sensible thing she could think of; take a long shower.

Her muscles instantly relaxed as the water hit her. It was relieving, particularly with the cold weather outside. Jungeun brushed her wet hair back and sighed. Slowly, her hand inched down. She was tempted, and very horny.

_You know what? I can pleasure myself. I don't need some multimillionaire._

Jungeun started touching herself. Slowly, at first, just testing the waters. It was easy - as if her body expected it. She let out a whimper as the pleasure built up, escalating like a glass of water being slowly filled. Jungeun closed her eyes, and the vision that met her excited her even more.

She quickened the pace, rubbing her clit and catching her breath often as she imagined Sooyoung's naked body. Jungeun used her other hand and tugged gently at one of her nipples, leaning against the cold tiles for support.

The glass was almost full, and she gave it her last bits of effort, grinding against her own fingers as the orgasm finally hit her, her intimacy tender and dripping along with the water.

And still, she found herself needing Sooyoung. Even when she was completely alone, Sooyoung continued to be the one she depended on.

Especially, for pleasure.

[...]

Jungeun couldn't say she was surprised when she heard the knocking. What surprised her the most was how her heartbeat spiked up when she opened the door.

She let Sooyoung in without saying anything - she was too frustrated and nervous and blabbering words would just make things more confusing.

"How you've been?" Sooyoung asked, so casually that it was easy to forget all the previous drama.

But Jungeun didn't forget.

"Well." She lied, facing away from the woman so she wouldn't see the dark circles and the signs of sadness in her face.

"Mhm," Sooyoung muttered, absentmindedly while she hung her coat on the rack and took her shoes off. "I haven't been well, if I'm being honest with you. And I really want to be honest with you, Jungeun."

Jungeun took a deep breath to try and stop herself from tearing up as her voice hit her in several ways she wouldn't admit. She didn't speak, waiting - fearing - the woman would have more to say. Dreading it and expecting it at the same damn time was exhausting, but she could not help it.

"I should have told you before. I should have been honest- I should've never hidden anything from you. I'm sorry you felt like you couldn't trust me."

"You shouldn't have dodged my questions.." Jungeun muttered, feeling her heart pound and ache, a familiar ache. "If you didn't, maybe we wouldn't be here.."

"Yeah. You're absolutely right."

"But I… I don't know if I can forgive you, Sooyoung." She finally had the courage to turn and face Sooyoung, and the view pained her more.

_I need you._

"I know that." Sooyoung nodded, her eyes vivid, meeting hers like the old times, but understanding too. "I've talked to Jiwoo. I've done what I should have done years ago. I don't expect that to change your mind, but now you know."

_I trust you._

"That's… that's good, I think," Jungeun stammered, thinking faster now. "that's- that's great."

Sooyoung smiled, a small smile of amusement, but still, the same understanding of before. She was standing taller, even without shoes, and the white shirt and jeans made her seem simple; unlike any other time she had ever seen her, but still beautiful as always.

"She said that if I hurt you, she would come for me with guns blazing."

Jungeun laughed. "That sounds like Jiwoo."

_You've hurt me… but you heal me every time I look at you._

"I'll try my best not to, Jungeun. I can't promise you anything, because I'm flawed like anyone else, but I swear I'll try my best. So please, don't forget me. Don't send me away." Sooyoung looked down, her tone now practically defeated. It broke Jungeun in pieces.

"I can never forget you even if I tried, Sooyoung."

She stepped closer to the woman, looking up at her like she always did.

_I love you._

_I can never let you go._

Jungeun hugged Sooyoung, first softly, and then hard, holding on to her like a koala, crushing her with affection.

"If you ever do that again, I'll help Jiwoo with the guns." She muttered in her ear, her heart bursting with happiness when she heard Sooyoung's loud laughter.

They backed away from the hug, still holding each other's hands. The woman was looking at her so sweetly, she felt embarrassed and shy under her gaze.

"What is it?" Jungeun looked away a few times, but Sooyoung's gaze stood firm.

"I've missed you."

Jungeun started the kiss this time. She basically couldn't get enough of Sooyoung's lips, pulling her in by the neck. If the moments they had shared before were heartfelt, the moment they were sharing right now was nothing short of needy and blissful. It did not help that Sooyoung already knew the secret to all her puzzle boxes.

She shook her head when Sooyoung pointed to the bedroom. Jungeun was too impatient for anything that wasn't _right here, right now_. They continued their tango, lips still crossing when Jungeun's back hit the sofa. She _throbbed_ when Sooyoung found that ridiculous spot on her neck, and sucked.

"Mhm, Sooyoung..." That familiar image returned to her mind. The woman, all bare, her body something Jungeun wanted to know all about.

She grabbed her hand, guiding it so it were Sooyoung's fingers who were undoing the buttons in her jeans.

"I'll do what you want, you just need to tell me what it is." The woman whispered, causing chills to appear all over the blonde's neck.

"Fuck me.." she hissed as Sooyoung teased her bundle of nerves through the fabric of her panties.

"What's the _magic word?"_ Sooyoung kissed the corner of her mouth, gently flicking the nub, teasing and teasing but never giving.

"P-please..."

"That's my girl."

One second, and Sooyoung slipped in. Three seconds, and Jungeun saw fireworks. She didn't know why she came so fast, but it wasn't long before she came again, her lips swollen with all the kissing and biting Sooyoung was doing.

"God, you ruined the couch..." the woman trailed, sucking her wet fingers clean. Meanwhile, Jungeun was so done she couldn't even get up, settling on staying there, staring at the woman who had just destroyed her.

In the best way possible.

She watched as Sooyoung got up, the pep in her step completely back.

"Hey, where are you going?" Jungeun asked with the rest of energy she still possessed.

"I'm gonna go ahead and rent a restaurant for us tomorrow, if that's okay with you. There's things we need to talk about." Sooyoung stole a quick glance and her lips were smiling - still swollen - but her eyes were serious. Whatever it was she wanted to talk about, it probably had to do with moving a step further in their relationship.

Jungeun didn't know what it meant, but she was scared and excited, all at the same time. Her mind wasn't working properly to think about it too extensively.

"It's okay with me."

[...]

Jungeun woke up and immediately saw the blue post-it glued to the dresser. It said _Jinsol will come pick you up at 12:30 PM_ in cursive letters, clearly in Sooyoung's handwriting.

"Great..." she muttered under her breath, rushing to change as the morning was already fading away. She hoped seeing Jinsol again wouldn't be too awkward; after all, she was technically Sooyoung's ex.

_But then again, so is Jiwoo, and she's my best friend… stop being an idiot, Jungeun._

After minutes of internal debate, she finally settled on some casual slacks and a dress shirt, leaving the top two buttons undone. If Jungeun was right about her very real hypotheses on what the meeting with Sooyoung was about, showing some skin would probably give her more power in the discussion.

She took a deep breath before going down the elevator, knowing Jinsol was probably down there waiting already.

And as she stepped out of the apartment complex, Jungeun knew she was right. There she was, waiting by the same black SUV from before. Only this time, she wasn't staring straight at Jungeun, but looking at her phone disinterestedly. It bruised her ego just a little.

"Oh, there you are." Jinsol muttered, rounding up the car without a word. Jungeun already knew it was her cue to enter the vehicle as well, stepping in the passenger seat with budding nerves.

Jungeun waited with baited breath to see if Jinsol would say or do something. Anything. At least keep her mind at ease with some conversation. But she just wouldn't say anything, instead hyper-focusing on the traffic and nothing else.

"The silent treatment, huh..." she muttered, absolutely frustrated that Jinsol wouldn't talk to her over what she considered to be petty bullshit.

"I don't wanna ruin anything else, Jungeun, so forgive me if I stay quiet."

Jinsol's tone was sullen and devoid of any joy. Jungeun could also detect some regret in it, and as it clicked, she started to understand why.

"It wasn't your fault."

Jinsol scoffed at that. "It wasn't? Because it sure seems so." She was gripping the steering wheel so hard, her knuckles were turning pale.

"Believe me when I say it wasn't. If anything's to blame, it's my stupid lack of common sense."

The driver laughed lightly at that, but shook her head anyway. "You were wise to want all the cards on the table. If you didn't demand them, maybe Sooyoung would have never told you about anything. To protect you or something." She gripped the bridge of her nose in frustration. "Sooyoung has this weird need to try and protect everyone from everything and take the fall herself. It backfires most of the time."

Jungeun raised her eyebrows at the information. It did make sense; but Jungeun wasn't one to need protection. She valued trust over everything else.

"Okay." She nodded slowly just as Jinsol pulled to the curb of the restaurant, which was of course, probably expensive as fuck. "Thanks for the ride, Jinsol."

Jinsol smiled. "No problem, Jungeun. And please leash Sooyoung as fast as you can- she's in real need of containment."

"I sure will."

Jungeun waved goodbye, watching as Jinsol drove off. It puzzled her, what the woman meant. _Leash her? Is she a dog or something?_

But as she entered the restaurant, the blonde started having a good idea of what exactly Jinsol's words meant. She was greeted by a suited male with a welcoming smile.

"You must be Ms. Kim Jungeun. Please, follow me."

She did. The whole restaurant was empty, except for one table far back, shielded from the looks of any passerby who happened to near the restaurant. Sooyoung was waiting for her in the table, wearing what seemed to be a sleeveless navy dress.

Jungeun didn't know why she felt so confident at that time, but just as the man disappeared from their sights, she greeted Sooyoung with a wide smile, almost posing.

"Well, get up so I can see you, beautiful."

The caught-off-guard expression in Sooyoung's face made it all the more worthwhile.

With a little hesitance, the woman did. And of course, she was beautiful. The dress cut right at her thighs, which looked smooth like butter. _Can't wait to spread that butter on my toast…_

"Well, you look amazing too, Jungeun." Sooyoung's confident smile was back in an instant. She stepped closer to the girl, silently taking her hands in hers. "I love the outfit."

"Yeah, you probably paid for it at some point," Jungeun chuckled, trying not to ogle any further than she was already. "and besides, simple is sexy."

"You prove it, absolutely." The way the woman towered over her definitely didn't help with the attraction she was feeling wildly in her chest and in _other places too_. "Come, have a seat."

Jungeun did, and it really didn't help calm her down one bit. In fact, it only made her more nervous, but she wouldn't let it affect her confidence. She felt the urgent need to trailblaze in this conversation.

"So, what is it that you wanted to talk about so much that you had to book a whole restaurant for it?"

Sooyoung had a modest smile on her lips. "You."

The blonde had to snicker at the response, because she didn't expect it to be so direct. "Okay. What about me?"

"Well, if I may..." Sooyoung trailed as she reached for her purse in the seat next to her, zipping it open and pulling out some papers, which made Jungeun's eyes widen considerably.

"Okay… what is that?"

"It's a contract of sorts. I wanted to pitch some ideas at you, because I really don't want to hold anything back anymore. You want my honesty, so I'm being honest with you."

The woman handed her the papers carefully, and Jungeun started reading what was printed on them. It really seemed official, like an actual contract, but none of the terms would be found in any regular contract made by a company.

_Any ideas for sex must be authorized and consented to… the use of toys will be suggested and products relating to any suggestion will be gifted… invitations to official reunions and meetings related to the company will be sent and some will be mandatory…_

"So… I'm your plus one from now on?" Jungeun looked up from the papers, ignoring all the other obviously more eye-catching terms.

"If you agree." Sooyoung tried to seem confident, but the blonde could tell the woman was nervous. After all, this seemed like much.

But for Jungeun, it wasn't.

"I'll become 'the girl on the CEO's arm', won't I?" She pursed her lips, worried about the sudden attention in the media, just imagining how hard they would lampoon her with the headlines.

"Probably, but I'll try my best to avoid it."

Jungeun sighed, closing her eyes and taking a sip of water. Frankly, the checks and balances didn't seem too extreme, and the media had already seen her face before.

And of course, she wanted to be with Sooyoung, first and foremost.

"Fine." She faked an expression of frustration, but was smiling wide. "Do I sign on the dotted line?"

Sooyoung laughed, and handed her a pen.

Things were only just starting for them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first, apologies for taking so long to post this chapter. i've been really out of it for the past month and the writer's block has been really bad for this story in specific, so, again, i'm really sorry.
> 
> second, this was the last chapter i've finished for this story. i'm still writing it, i promise, but chapters are gonna be rarer than ever, so, i understand if you guys don't want to wait or read anymore.
> 
> i would really appreciate some more concrete feedback, as it helps me with writing and inspiration in general. if you want to support me and my stories, that's the best way to do it. again, i'm sorry for the delay, but if you're worried about me abandoning this story, don't worry. if i do feel like stopping, you guys will be the first to know.
> 
> lastly, i wanna thank everyone who keeps up with my stories. i really appreciate you guys and all of the comments, even if they are short. thank you for sticking around, it means a lot.
> 
> i'll see you again soon, and thank you, once again.


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